PfiGE SEX m Happy Thanksgiving. Don‘t bite oi? more turkey than you can chew this time. They ought to slay the goofy guy, who put whipped cream on pumpkin pie. 1; >‘li * 4‘ Getting It Straight “How did you get that black eye, Vance?” “The leading lady gave it to me.” “HOW come?" “She told me to straighten out her ros- ary.” “Well, she couldn’t have given you a black eye for that." “I thought she said hosiery.” :75 Pl: >1: =3 “Do any of you boys know anything about shorthand?” said the sergeant to a bunch of recruits. There was a quick response. Six of them stepped forward at once. “Righto! They’re short—handed in the cook house.” So the six spent the morning peeling potatoes. ’31 it :91 all: A maiden whose Puritan mulls Were strictly opposed to the dance. Explained the mntortions Of her southcrmoet portions As clue to a wasp in her -~. at: e v: :2 lie Stays Have you heard the one about the fellow who worked in a corset shoppe? He pulled (l jaw strings and now he’s the manager! $ 3;: in l! The explorer, back from a long; and hazardous journey, was being: entertained at a tea. An elderly lady, who had asked him 10,000 quotations was still holding: forth. “find what other hardships; did you have?" she squeekcd. ”Well, madam," answered the explorer, “one day i! ate the 30105 out of my hoe-to.” “My my,” exclaimed the dear old lady, “Oh, no,” unzipped the. explorer. “lllou see, I‘m 31:31, nuts about going hemlock and I wanted to have a damned: good car- case!” r: e e we Tony: “Vi-That are you thinking about?“ Mary: The same thing as you.” Tony: “ch11, I’m sorry, but it’s impossible. Fit: in training." 1%! ”S: 9F 161 Congratulations! Fanny was thoroughly angry swimming teacher. “The fresh thing!” she exclaimed. “After I won the race, he came to me and said, ”My dear, you kept your end up magnificently’l" is Xi: 94: k at her The cleric was: new in the sporté'rtg goods department, and his first customer was; or. lucious brunette who minced up to the counter, turned on a big pair of blue eyes, and exclaimed: “I’m looking for some lures to catch a big fish.” The clerk caught his breath, them stepped back a step to look. “Lady,” he said, "you’ve got ’em!” >2: 2: 1k a): Sunny—J think you’re the nicest girl in town. May 1 have a date tonight? Violet (indignantly)—Certainly not. Not if that’s the“ way you feel about me! 1! a 3% W Casing the Place A sailor was cast away on a desert is land. After he had been there for ten years, he awoke one morning and saw a lovely young woman floating toward the beach on a barrel. The barrel washed ashore and the woman approached. “Heigh ho,” she said, “And how long have you been here?" “Nigh on ten years,” said the sailor. “Gracious," said the woman. “Then I shall give you something you certainly haven’t had in a long time.” “Bust my leg!” said the sailor. “Don’t tell me you got beer in that barrel?” (continued on page seven) TECHNOLOGY NEWS am . Emile fireelee Held fill Wield Ecol“ ll: GODS Bob Crcagun and Tom Coleus The line! toucllball game in the inter- fraternity tourney will be played this wool; when Phi Kappa Sigma meets Delta Lumb- (la Xi for the much prized trophy new rest- ing on the Pi Kap mantelpiccc. Phi Kappa Sigma’s pledges beat Delta Tau Delta‘s pledges 2 to 0 when the teams met last week to decide who would furnish a barrel of fun for the two houses. Imagine llahl’s embarrassment when he was tagged behind his goal, “bad pass from center, coach.” Smilln’ Ed Kaescr has been thrown in the “Dell Tub” more than any other two men- exhibitions given every day. Deli Roger Sellstmm was ambling down the Outer Drive in his Eighteenth Century model when the springs gave way and Roger ended up on the grass along the Drive. Eight bucks to tow it in and what a mess of amalgamated iron. zilplia Sigma Will is celebrating Thanks- giving vacation with a good olddas'hiomcd hayride at Stallion). chillies tomorrow night (November 19. Cider, doughnuts, and tmmpin’ to the tune of the fiddle will he the program after the ride itself. Pledge Captain llrliott, from Oklahoma will show the. boys how they dance down in his; coun- try. Sandstorm has: been taken into Chi apsilon and Damhros into Honor 1. The l’l liapp pledges were deflated mid befuddled at some of the questions; fired at them by the actives at. the last “lrlquisi. lion.” Their only chance for retaliation will he the activepledge touclibrawl game to» morrow afternoon. Padding and paddling are both frowned on. 1 don't know What l‘ll do for Pi Kapp “dirt” now that limlillm and ham-ell have signed 3- truce not to re- veal anything about the other. kit 91‘ ‘61 1!! ll’lml Armour fraternity man was seen in who! her with what pretty lemme called “decay.” it fit vi: :1; ll {Earl llpm-cnberg really loves "Butch" why does; he have gal friends from St. Louis come up to Chicago for the weekends. Does any one know whether Wally Jordan tmd "Purim.“ érlplmllrr still look at the moon from the same angle. Helm ’l‘ml Helm held her Pledge Formal lam Saturday night. The Delta were a swanky looking hunch with the buye- in tails and the gals in “those things; that make your heart {:0 o~0-oh.” Refreshments; were served at midnight. with singing in the ”Dell Manner.” The orchestra performed to perfection and there is a rumor going the rounds that Duriwortli got to kiss" new» tliy just ’cause he bought her a black GODDESSES Helen F. Marzullo Hedging is well under way new, and each sorority is doing its best to make the lives of its: pledges “comfortable." Pledging ceremonies were held by the Sigma Omicron Lambda sorority, last Tues- day, in the tea room. After the necessary information was gained, the pledges were presented with corsages of orchid sweet peas and yellow roses. The Lemmas have their pledges well under control! Pledge-Mletrcse Mary Ann Knirsch gave them strict orders, last Wed- nesday, at a PledgeCouncil meeting. The six “bellies" had just grinned—and obeyed! The girls have planned to help a poor family 1.0 enjoy a happy Thanksgiving, by preparing a gift basket of various veget» ables, meats, and fruits. The basket shall be presented to the family by Florence Moss, the Lambda prexy. The members of the Kappa Phi Delta sorority held their monthly meeting at the home of Pat Arno. The meeting was ac tended by two newly initiated alumni mem- bers, ll‘lorencc Alder and Jeanette Mao- llm-kic. Jeanette also visited the 01’ Alma Mater last Wednesday. Nice to see you again, Jeanette! Ulurcy Mlle Gumball, the tiniest of the Kappa Kewpies is new a very succesel‘ul private secretary. Good luck to you, Clax-cyl “Well, llollm, that‘s all more. is; there isn‘t nnymorr.” See you next week! orchid (who’s kidding who). 0:) October 27, a group of men met at the home of Sid Greenbcr' for the purpose Di reorganizing the Eta chapter of the Zeta Beta Alpha fraternity. The chapter had formerly been active at Lewis, but was dis- lmmlcd Hi"‘l’(ll'fll years ago. Elomc of the mm: mm considered at this meeting were election of oliiccru am] the planning of a social cal— endar for the remainder of the your. The Wealth ol' the election were :15; follows: Ru- bin Bloom, grand niastcrgéxmricc Ruben» Still)!” scribe; Allen Mower, ‘mnrcr. Recog. million of the group was; given by the Lcwle Student Ummcil at. its meeting on November A board of fraternity coordination has been organized at Lewis for the purpose of ”promoting greater harmony cud coopera- tion between the fraternities at Lewis with regard. to school activities.” The fraterni- ties represented are: the Dam/Iowans, Gam~ mu Rho, and Zeta. Beta Alpha. The Lewis Student Council approved sending (me mem— ber of the board as representative on the Council, thus giving the Lewis fraternities representation similar to that of the Pan- Hrllem'c Council. “Lefty” Wright, our girl of the week, helped ma fill space by bouncing brightly into 212 last Thursday, and cheerily chimi- ing, “Good morning everybody!” The a8- fiembled hoard-cxam-takers didn’t even mend at attention. La Wright went unit in the corridor, blinked at. the room number, and stumbled down the hull, kicking at stray art nutrients. tlenter’s been slipping for one of the AHT gals, but lately another babe has frittered away his time. Now he’s slipping in two div 'rections, like a hog on ice. Mario Fraccaro breezed into fresh class notsolongago and found a epittoon on his $5.50 drafting board. ’Twas labeled, “Please expectorate hyar." A spreading pool was glistening on the floor under the board. Nice going, Mac A. . . . and the same sadiet has been inscribing shorthand soliloquies on the blackboard. Translated, they advo- cate the election to the presidency of a gink named Mac Arthur. Storz has been (lock-fighting again. Lar- son is still in search of a date for last week’s arx party. Other results of the shambles are still coming in by A.P. wire. Dunlap is gradual- ly sobering up, and his nightshirt is once again doing duty as one of the drapes in his home. Mlchuclscn is still looking for his brew. And Hueskarl is conducting heavy correspondence (a counter defense) with the student body of National college. The second Frosh-Soph Touchbrawl comes off today. We predict gore galore. We will now dangle the noose of the week before your eyes. To wit: Pearson got a haircut! Arx of all aspects of assin‘init’yu—takc heed! For cons this column has been on a non-paying basis. But we spoiled a brand- new manicure tonight pounding out this column. Oh, it made. us simply furious! And then there‘s the overhead on the Noose office. So now we’re inaugurating it pro- gram of student “Subscription.” Half a buck a month keeps you out of the NOGSE. Ami after a while we’ll get rich writing no column at; all. And with this noose, we’ll leave you hanging on: (a) a gibbet; (b) our jabber; (c) a lamp post. The choice is yours, coming as it does under the influence of variables beyond our control. Affectionately, (limits. NU‘VIEMBER 18, 19141 WMW ' W n Mum 4-,. We» ‘ @l/iele ..... " llfifid/rjcwcs We... lly Raymond W. Sailor University of Minnesota extension divi» sich is offering 26 new courses, ranging from came "acraft to Greek mythology. >1: 2k ll: 4: When the movie “oomph" girl Ann Sheri. (lam, attended North Texas Slate Toaillnors roux-gr, one was known as Clara Lou Shel-in dam. . . . it =l4 ll: it Girls of Ohio State university pay 16 cents for a. full dinner, boys my :19 cents. ll: )lt ll: 5k A University of Virginia archaeologist wzmtml to examine an old stone mill at vapm-t, R. 1., in an cllort to ascertain its disputed origin. lilo borrowed a ladder from Newport firemen in order to cattle the wall, but: all he elm-led over police stopped him. “We don’t. (won allow Harvard and Yale boys to are in," will the. police, cxplninillg at long Htamding rule against permitting any one ln the ulrucmrc, which eomnv believe was built by the Viking-1. m l: w. m I]. is estimated that at least half the nearly 1,500,000 youths in American col- leges arc working to help pay their expens— es, while. 20 per cent are paying all costs. :1: a: all >l¢ Enrolled at ’llulmlo lmlvcrcity is a de- scendant of Paul Tulane, after Whom the li‘isl‘jtution was named. He is Louis Tulane Base of Ogden, Utah. xlr 2% Pl! 44 A $1,500 etudent loan fund raised by for- mer studehtc, a memorial to the. late Pro- fessor Jamel; Wilford Garner, has been set up at. the linivt‘rnity of lllinois. Profcasor Garner was an authority on international law and headed the political science de- partment of the university from 1904 until his death in 1038. 1,4 I}: 2'; 1k The traditional belief that women are more careless with personal apparel "than are men was challenged by Charles Huff, janitor in the Alumni Recitation hall at Grimxcll college. Hull, who saye that he has salvaged arti- cles from the class rooms ranging from text books to hobbyvpins, claimed, however, that men’s coats formed the major portion of the lost and found turnover. m 1k 2k :14 "University of North Carolina’s original I795 faculty of two members; wu‘ilxcd almost; a month until first student, Hint/on Janice, walked 200 miles to enroll. * )k *4 =l< Dr. J. A. Pierce of Harvard reports that when a meteor or shooting star passes through the atmosphere many miles above the ground it leaves behind it a trail of broken atoms which may last for many minutes. at: a: 7k u Prospective students are eligible for at scholarship at Princeton, and several of them at the Univcrrfiity ol’ l’teiziwylvunia, if their father worked on the Pennsylvania railway. ale 1k l: ale Dr. Raymond Walters, president of the University of Cincinnati and nationally Imoum for his surveys of college registra- ttuu, reports that numerous institutions, “including prominent eastern colleges for 772671," have conducted promotional cam- paigns and waived limitations on the size of freshman classes to ofiset losses in ujnper class enrollment. fl= :1: t: =l: The sanctum'sanctorum of male recluses at Milwaukee State Teachers. college has let down its bars to the coeds of the college every noon. Ever since the men's club contracted for a coke machine, there has been some violating of the sacred premises. Some of the. more progressive members of the Club even see dancing at a future date.