i’age 6
W

MARCH 4, 319’”.
swam.

 

 

 

 

  

 

 

 

Women Only | etiology

    
 

W 1'43 “NW:
5?§§.i¢.” 0 LE“?
"rut: emporium
M. Whom:- fi‘ WAY.

There are moms and there are more
prams, but nay have they touched the
heights as the one all reminisce on now.
Twas‘ most perfect from the black bowtie
to the lightest zephyr of the music. God,
what a statement but nevertheless true. . .
S’help me.

1: d! 3’; )8

Electrically speaking

“If your sweetheart is a blonde and you
love a hriinettemtmnsformer.

“If she gets grouehy—tickler."

“If she wants to meet. you for lunch-w
motor."

“If she wants a new mr-mrekister.”

“If she continues to insistu—olimixmtor.”

2a =lc

Jammy: “Every time I kiss you it makes
me a better man.”

Lill: “Well, you don’t have to try to gel to
heaven in one night.”
#6 3% :3 :43:

The vicar will continue his blossom ser-
ies of Friday evening addresses. The sub
jest next Friday will he “Hell”. The vicar
hopes to see you all there. A collection will
be taken up for a new heating system.

# 5? iii it

You’re as pretty; as o piclzcrenwiiy don’t
you hang yourself?
’5 15' 45‘ ll:

Bzifl’yiiotlorzs

Snood-«Flakes from Heaven, like it mood
last Week.

themtccl-«Josing a job by request.

An itch-«something that when you have
both hands full you always.

Ergo-«what a hen lays.

“The good old dayfi“mfil€‘ time when a
car parked and somebody got. out.

Phase—.4110 part of one’s anatomy that is
fed.

’1! I? 33% 41;
Wife: "Just suppose we wives slwukl go
on a strike?”
Husband: “Go right ahead. I’ve got u 2712:5032
of a strike-breaker in mind.”
as: t;

The minister advertised for a memory.
amt, and the next, morning a nicely dressed
young man rang the bell.

“Can you start the fire and get breakfast
by seven o’clock?” asked the minister.

“I. guess so,” answered the young man.

“Well, can you polish the silver. mosh
the dishes, and keep the house neat and
tidy?”

“Say, parson,” said the young fellow. “i
came here to see about getting married, but
if it’s going to be as much work as all that.
you can count me out right new.”

It: t? #4 3‘1

An explorer leads a dog’s life because he
travels from Pole to Pole.

#1 :i: ll: 1?-
Ample Grounds

Mahel—Vlfhy did you breath all” your em
gagement with that goodlooking young doe-
tor.

Betty—45h, it was his terrible writing.
Every time E had a letter from him I had
to take. it to a «lruggist to find out what
was in it.

)2: 5'5 =5: A<

An old-fashioned girl blushes when she
is embarrassed, but a modem girl is em,
borrowed when she blushes.

W in

“My husband travels so much that eoch
time he comes home he seems a perfect
stranger.”

Her friend: “How thrilling!"

The. real trouble with our youth today
is that. they were out all of the night he»
fore.

it X?! k "4
’ ’ mI-n 4. i a An» 4 ._.., . x
R £19982: bwuth». .t avesia't bunch,

It doesn‘t feel so very well.
H mm disgusted with my nose—-
The only thing it does, is blows. . . .
(You ain’t lyim’l)
Again we close the curtain and bid you a
cheery adios.
OH MIN! .

 

 

By Viodes

It’s common knowledge that the male
gender are worse gossips than the femmes
are reputed to be. And critical—~YII’E.’
Your slacking seams continually gel the
glad eye, your nails are a constant sub—
ject fm~ criticism, and numerous and sundry
other little details. But when you’ve
sprouted a. new hair do or come out with
a swish new outfit you irzight as well have
spared yourself the efiofl, for they’ve sml
clenly waxed deaf, amigo, and blind.

So let’s start spring cleaning early by
airing out some of our pet moves about
the domineering male sol. Since the boys
are so delightfully candid is their opinions,
let's sol the stage for o comeback. Here it
comes.

Follows with Cookie. Dusters:

What do we think of uickied herring with
ice cream? We like our boys clean shaven
unless he happens to be another Clark
Gable or Robert Taylor. Come out from
under. limys, unless you feel the need of
a disguise.

Hammers:

lt‘s the small thoughtful things that
count. Do you help the fair maiden on
with her wrap? Do you make a special trip
to close the car door after her? Do you help
her across the icy streets? if you don‘t,
brother, you had hotter start cutting-or
she will?
t‘loilics:

Those buggy twoedzi that have been in
the oiling for months are downright dis.
gusting. These sweat shirts and turtle heck
u‘ll‘airs belong with your 'overallswand the
bright plaid flannel shirts are loud enough
to he heard a block away.

Cigar smoking is; highly reminiscent of
that last movie I saw starring Edward G.
Robinsonmreplete with big town mclcoteers
and gangsters. Thumbs down. no i'mitter
what the White Owl aids are featuring.
“aiming: plays a pretty ii‘nhorwnt hurt in
any fellows social life. Most. girls would
rather dance than out, and if you don’t
hrotluar, Joe is; going to wield some still
(-mm‘iotition for your Lady Jame.

Will‘iltiiilllz‘ “guys are am to get you no-
where, but quick! The saying, "it ain’t
what you do but the way you do it" should
get some careful coheidemtion.

Eire you am (15031331?

Do you limit}, make {in eilort to get into
the spotlight. or try to grab the {renter of
the stage? You can talk right into a: minor
role if you don't watch your cues

l‘hmp Skulre‘ will find them. six-oi; right
on the bottom of the heap every time? A
girl doesn’t offer objections when e fellow
decides to spend an evening at her home,
on occasion, but when he begins to look as
much at home as the lump hi the corner,
he is apt to discover a Sign on the from door,
“MEASLES, KEEP OUT!”

fire you a good sport? Can you take a fair
amount of kidding without getting, {iii hett
up? Can you take "No" for an answer? Do
you mind when the girl friend 3 as out on
her own once in awhile? Orchids to you, if
you can!

   

 

 

 

Students:

W u want you to know that circumstances
over which we have no control make this
column possible—or irrepossible.

Seen at Michael Todd’s Cafe, practically
falling into their drinks whilst gazing at
lypszy Rose Lee. were those two blond
bombers from this side of the tracks, ll.
“Wills and “Dev" Trojan. Guess there's no
competing with that. gals! But who put
ll‘lorlne into such :1 daze? Pish Tush to you
for falling asleep in Dr. Meech’s Chaucer
class. Horrible!

And then there’s the one about that old
cutvup Clmmherlin, who has taken to manu-
facturing paper (lollies in class. I-‘iobby
Lohhy’s looking for people like you!!!
Speaking of unique goings on. there ought
to be an ordinm‘ice against dancing at drifts
without shoes. Remember «the Minnesota
Strike!

Personal: Mr. E”. lit. Rezidomniethinks that
perserverance is a good quality all right,
but how long does it take to get on the
in track with some ueople? Or are you just
having fun? While on the subject of poten-
tial killers, looks to me like Miller Khar-
iwy is trying to discover who of the Sigmhs
and Lamlidzm will give him the best price
on ti cigarette. And him with that. swish
new convertahlo all done up in beige and
blue.

Friday is the day for the Waghei‘ian hep-
cats to get together for a program of classi-
cal records. Bernice h‘oldman is one of the
originatorswhut what was i’etteriuo doing
there? ? ?

ll'l‘.-home of the Spaghetti slurping
Sororities. The Kappa Kupien and Lambda
Lulus arrived Monday morning with spagh-
etti fairly stickin’ out of their ears. (They
forgot to put it up Sunday night.) Seems
the respective groups suffered a convenient
lapse of memory in regard to that little
matter of a diet, and really indulged. Speaka
mg of food, “Vittlin‘ Time" (lotilet just ain’t
normal! She tucks five pieces of cake
under her belt. and she's flittin’ around
as graceful as a little gazelle, minus a
few pounds. While Bob “'l‘iuy 'Ji‘im” Meyer
just smiles cynically about the whole thing.

ileum-tumult. in charge 03' the tables that
are turned: Where, oh where are the biol-
ogy lab tables that Doe Rodrick was so
sure or getting? There just ain’t no justice!
While on the subject of the learned men
who give us the higher learning that in—
stitutions are dedicated to, Kharmseh‘s chem
class: adjourned to the Wells’ St fire to
glean some first hand knowledge on com~
bustion Wednesday, ELM. And in the hiol»
ogy department We find our friend Herman
who demands that the speaker be recog-
nized by the chalr.~how does. that cone
shaped hat fit?

.The junior civils; no. 2 who started

roaring through the intro—mural bowling
tourney like a west bound steam train,
ended up like a Paducah local. Lotsa
cheers and stuff for the Lewis Institute
Streamliner! I !

Wally ‘Wcrneelc, he of Armour, can’t keep

(continued on page seven)

 

How To Mueller more Ari llll fiewiiugg
iieeouie A. While Eu his fishy heeeoue

Bowling is a game of tenpins of which
mine are used. The other one is always left
standing. It is a game in which one rolls a
heavy ball down a lane called an alley flank-
ed on each side by a gutter that serves just
as a sand trap does in golf. The ball is
aimed at a mess of standing wooden clubs
technically speaking, pins, arranged there
by a pin-setter who may be your friend or
not, depending on how much you pay him.

This is a vital factor because it is here
that the tenth pin comes into play. if you
want it left standing you don’t have to
pay him a cent but if you want it down
that’s a matter to be decided between your-
self and your ally the pinsetter .

\Vhen you have come to terms you can
begin bowling. You hunt for a suitable ball.
This is one of the mysteries of the game.
Usually someone else has the one you want
or there just isn’t any such ball at all. So
you pick up any kind. You don’t realize
that you selected one Whose thumb hole is

much too small until you see the ball
bounce merrily down the alley into a gut-
ter. You view all this from an unceremon~
ious position on the floor. Next time you’ll
try not to slip.

For your second shot you pick out a hall
with an enormous thumb hole. You’re not
taking ahy chances this time and you slide
up to the line. Bam! The hole is too big
and the bull drops. That’s right, on your
toes. It always happens that way.

The pin-setter doesn’t see your misfor—
tune but he hears the ball drop. He thinks
you just bounced another bail down the
alley and so he kicks; over a few pins. He
hears a chorus of moans to the effect that
he shouldn’t cheat so openly.

After you have nursed your toes back to
their original shape, you continue. After
ten frames of this suffering you are sold
on bowling because you and your ally have
put through a 27 game. it’s a record,“ they
tell you. They won’t tell you what kind.

 

What? no
introduction. Who the hell do you think
we are to think up a new intro week after
Wt’l‘k and incidoiitly, this: column, the some
ml the Wake of the News, depends upon

its friends and their contributions. All.
“interim received by the Tech Nowu Box or
reportom will be judged upon its demerits
am! if found sullhzioutly mmmvory will be
printed (in the illlltzltriug. and Super Sludge»
will find it»; may to that paragon of perfec-
tion. the filmvel).
7!: >9! 2!: ll!

FLASI~Iz~Call out the Reserves! It’s a
4:1] AlurmH Armour's singing wolves, bet"
ter known as the Glee Club, will rehearse
tomorrow night in the auditorium with the
Lewis Girl’s Glee Club. The II'I‘WA. will
he on hand to scout out new pledge mater-
ial.

all in )l: m
Overheard in Sliwa’s car after the Armour
play: (characterswblclc “Lamby” Pariai'n
and his dale.) She: “Don’t, Dials, don’t!
Stop it! Stop ill! . . . S~l~l~l-lap!” Diclm'e’s
statement. to the moss in explanation of
this incident was quoteml didn’t do any-
thing until we got out to the Outer Drive—m
unquote. However, our “informer didn’t give
us a report on activity in Sliwa’s county,
_ which means that ”Hank Boy" must have
kicked over plenty to keep things quiet!

it at l! :it

First reports; on the owlmming teum’o
trip to 'l‘cnnueooc, are very vogue-«us first
reports generally are! No one wants to
say anything, lam; our stowaway on the
’l‘ennousce trip, Yehudi, diuclomzd the follow-
ing slush! “Playboy” liladonmchci' almuot
had a not-value breakdown when the boys)
dropped into the University all Gilt-limousine
cafe for lunch. He tried to date up every (:0-
ed in the joint. Result: He got his dam, Mil-‘15
Jane Ellis, and l'ouud in letter from her
awaiting him on Will return to Chi.” And
:90 the Armour wolvnu’ technique draw:
blood in another new field!

:94 ’5‘- ”IE ll!

FLASH: I-Iowie Young seen at the bowl-
ing alley “pitching” four strikes in a row
and muttering, before each (lelioem, “This
(me’s for Marge.” . . . And then he got a
7-10 railroad! Who was that for, Howie?

#4 '2‘ alt vir-

Al’lrr that, Friday mite. concert at that
South Side Church. the senior civil “Glee
Clubbers” and Mr. Lillian lilutkus advanced
on ‘ Jul’ (:itwalip, from chm-uh to ‘Gul’ city!
Once more, they invaded a taxi dance-plum
w—Jl‘lmt's where the show ends-ml guess
we‘ll have to get a whole new staff of
agents—«dose mugs-i ibi'iber-z too easy!

in at at

Recognition has finally come to the
Ii'l’WA. Sonny Welssmzan, as of Sat. Feb.
22, 1941 is by unanimoue approval the fa~
culty sponsor. After the play, Sonny sent
his wife home and danced with Elly “Legs”
Moore, Mickey Walker of Lewis, and as
many of the others as possible

m a: at u

Cnroueal at the Junior Formal

Before dinner: Prof. Zwissler starting
early with Old Overholt highballs flowing
like water; Orescan, Goodman, and Jacob-
son helping Zwiss to smother the stuff . . .
Big Pete muttering sweet little nothings to
his itsie hitsie Eileen Robinson. . . . The
Rho Dells occupying three tables; every»

one very formal and dignified. The pass. é'

word: “How about something to drink?”
. . . Dan Brown sneaking up, oh so close,
as he emanates loving glances for his
Elaine. . . . Doc Davey, disgusted, with his
shirt flapping all over as he takes tickets
at the door.
Under the Time—willows:

mfii—«Zwiss and Nichin really emote. To
see those two acting up one would think
the cameras were trained on them and they
were butchering a scene from Romeo and
Juliet.

11:03—Johnuy Butkus makes his first exit
(with Lil, of course) and nothing is seen of

(continued. on page seven)