{Elem we we:
”MEWWW.” «- one
was: euoeewow
ow weane- w new.

 
 

With an gol and a ding. a yip anal u gripe.
looky what‘s a oomln’ 'l‘l'no .EUNKGR FOR-
MAL, Elmo nnpamgonerl, cximions creme
de la creme of all dances, ill in.

5k 3l= $3: of

“I couldn’t sleep a wink on the train
last night.”

“How come?”

“There was a midget in the berth above
anti he kept pacing back anal forth all the
time.”

an e a as:
A cute Emile 60“ from 8%. Paul
Wore a “newspaper firms" to a hall
Her: dreoo caught on flee
final burnetl her entire
Sport; page. comic seclion and all.
:3: e 1:

“Doctor, is there anything wrong with
me?”

“Yes, miss, bot it’s trifling.”

“Oh, I don’t think that’s so very wrong,
do you?”

w ax 1;:

An optimistic old maid in a gal who be
lieves right to the end that some night a
Prince Charming will come in and rouse
her.

85 =3 f5 36!

“Mary, have you ever awakened in the
morning with a grouoh?”

"Gracious, Betty! You know that l’m not,
martial.”

24! e 7‘; 1%

Customer: "Have you frogsl legs?"

Waitress: “No, you fresh thing, We rheu-
matism that makes; me walk like that."

e e as): e

Seaman Sam calls; his; holly an immigration-
olon because: lt divitlee his allemion, mm»
Meow [from his Monetize. multiplies. his» worn
Flee onel atlas to file mlsei‘y.

1% n e :3
Typical {Zoe/£3
My saddle shoes are dirty,
There’s no powder on my {2039,
My permanent’e gone with the summer,
And my ruffled undies Show.

My skirt’s a bunchy pleated plaid,
My sweater’s long and baggy:
I'm hollow-eyed from lose of sleep-—
"Who solo that I look hoggy?

l pop my chewing gum in class;

I have a cowboy walk;

1 mm handsprings on the camoue.
Oh! Boy! Do people talk?

There’s just one blot upon this life

Of comfort rest and eaoe~

Why don’t I date like other girls?

Are boys just hard to please?
’l‘ 15 :3: W

The height of absent-mindednees was re-
cently reached by a burglar when he tried
to steal some money out of a girl’s-2 ewclo
ing and then forgot what he went after.

in xi:

Sally: “You know that doctor that final
moved lo town? l’m going to have him
examine me.”

Betty: “But you’re perfect everywhere."

Sally: “Sure, but does he know it?”

n e :1: e

Boar-(ling house lazily—“Do yon wanfi 2::
room?"

fitnfienlm‘llo, l joint wont to {linguise my-
eelf as a banana and eleep in the limit one.”

n l: a:

$135!. a film

“Joyce turned off all the lamps ’cepl one
funny little green table light.”

”Then what happened, Milt?"

“Well . . . I’ve driven automobiles too
long not to know what a green light
means.”

:5 e :2 v:

Wife: Jack, dear, I hardly know how to
tell you, but-comb-soon—there will be
a third sharing our little love nest.

Hubby: My darling! Are you certain?

Wife (murmuring): Positive. I had a let-
ter from mother this afternoon which says
she is coming to live with us next wee "

’fi‘lxafi’s all this wreck, but see you at. flee
FORE/5%. 0H MEN!

TEGHNOLOGY NEWS

“m.

iOiher Compuses

Chm-lee 1. Bull

 

 

Someone in an E22519”; college suggested
filial. the tactful way for a mom to inform
his daughter’s boy friend that it was time to
depart was to (sasually wall: through the
mom carrying a box of filo-osmium food.

>1: :5 e no

The University of Minnesota now has

1,756 persons on its faculty.
" e x» xi

Eastern New Mexico college Students
really gel lheir money’s worth out of the
$4.50 they pay for simian; activity fee. Be-
sides admittance in oil campus ofloé'rs the
fee entitles the student to nine omnths of
mlertaimnem including operas, plays, con-
certs, teas, picnics, lectures, tickets 1.0 a.
(loomlown movie theater, and a subscrio
Hon lo the college neumympm’.

1}: 7r: o: S?

Members of 2m advent-eel mlcnltm claw at
Stool lnmimlo recently vow-(l lo hold close
at 7 o‘clot-k in the morning lo ovoicl con-
flict with minor (-lzweee. The penalty for
lamina-2o lo a live ("mail lino witlel: will go
into a fund to be novel for o clam party at,
who eml of the term.

23: a! :l )3»

A Harvard campus poll discovered that,
over sixty percent of the record purchases
were classical music. The students pre-
fer-red old-fashioned eentimomaiity and
Spaniel": sonoriioe lo the moclei‘n "not ma-
mos.“

bk 3)? i? :1!

Upon being naked how slie liked college,
on Illinois; Sizzle Non-moi nniwmily coed N:-
plied. “School ie OK. It ix; 3 goml way to
lzill time between week-mule."

(continued on page self/en}

 

meow? 1

Good evening, ladies and gentlemen: The
mail man’s bunions shore must have sullen
ed a relapse with all the valentines; and
s21fl1-0n~oolored slips being passed around.

 

 

Interesting little tidbits from the Inter—
l“raterni1y«Sorority (lance: Si Fl’oelich was
gum-(ling something oi this super-soiree
with a cannon. But just what, nobody
knows. Your adoring public, glamor boy (1')
lloh Weiss chose the some evening to celem
brute his birthday. And boy, did he ce1e~
brute it. Yep. with all flavors of lipstick.

Famous last words; “Since Christmas; you
ain’t got. nothing on me.”

FLASH! The rats in Dr. Boom-‘5 lab are
infanticipating again. When does Doc start
handing out. me cigars? Speaking of rats,
here’s a cheesy bit of gossip. Although cu—
pid has come and gone, rumor has it. that.
the (-x-zms—lociutr managing editor received
a special delivery valentine for the second
your in succession. A beautiful thing, on
Signed! (How romantic!) Enclosed only a
torn file can]. Could in be that. Lewis’ one
and only ploy-boy can‘t take no [or am am
swei‘? And it progressed from a friend to
a dear sweetheart in only one year. Time
marches: on! What next?

Food for scandal: How come the Gunman.
ling lululnuls, Honour and Jungm- get their
vitamin quota over here so often? S’motter
don“t, they feed you on the Houlheidc, boys?
Incidentally, Flormu‘o finds: 1,1113 night school
courses: highly instructive, especially with
:olahad Her-v.05: to explain it all to her.

Where oh where does lion Calhoun get
those tantalizing how Lies? They‘re so in-
triguing” Gums i'm just snap happy.

(continued on page seven)

 

”fifiie filleolo fifiolfi

€ lfililfi

lly Ruben Common

Triangle held formal inltiolion ceremo-
flies in? [on men Sunday, February six-
ieemh. The new activee are: Louie River,
{“hzirleo l’liclzm, Room-t (Jivioli, John Voluk-
akin. horny Mollill, ‘William Poorer, Harold
Roma, Eloweu fillwuror, Jock How, aml Wil-
Hum Daniele. The initioaio‘o banquet was
held at the Oyster llouoe of {he Morrison
Hotel. Triangle was; lwnormi by limo pre-
t-Lt‘m‘e of lls‘otl'wr E. Paul Rololmrr} of Cin-
(‘innoli—«ilzo national pz'oeiilcm; llmmer B.
Gaston of Chicagowmomher of ’l“rizmgle's
Nailional Council; Brother Cori lloutler 0!
Chicagowan Armour alumnus, who is. presi»
{lent of the Alumni organization, omi oev-
oral other alumni. Boll Hweeney. president,
of the active chapter at Armour, acted as
iozmimaster- and told many a lake of 2m-
z-ieni vintage. The new lnitimes Loki many
humorous incidents which coo-unreal during
“Courtesy Week.” Triangle held a “Brawl"
at lhe house Friday, February {wemyfirsn
em} surangely enough everyone had a (fizzle.
i‘imige llzmny Seine.) dated {he heel cook
in the North-Side area. ls that all Else can
do, Danny?

filial“: Higmu Phi furtlxeml its program
of expannion by pledging ihu‘oe freshmen.
The zwophytt-sz are: Bum: l’etemon. Roy
Johnson, and Rom. Brindle. The Alpha
Ségo {ml their mass approval on "The New
£91m; am} Needles” and especially likml like
”fl” Man-act.

l’i Kappa l’lii held “Courtesy Vl’eek” last
week for the further enlightenment, of
backward pledges. It seems the children
had difficuhies with their fraternity instruc-
tors who were careful noL to “spare the rod
and spoil the child." When will Frances, the
cat, have kittens and how many will or-
rive, are both questions of paramount in-
terest to the Pi Kane.

The big question at the Deli house is
about “Bownwind” Jaxon. It is a matter of
supreme importance to the Delis, whether
or not “Downwind’s” face has ever been
seen. Any evidence bearing on this ques»
tion will be gratefully accepted by any Dell.
Saturday’s card party ended up as a com-
bination dance and bridge party. Finesse
was apparent’in both games. Belt Jonn Le-
Valley writes from Seattle that the navy is
the right place to biz—“Women are so at-
lentive now.”

fill lfififioi’ofi figoe fifi

fillllllllfifill‘llflfi
By Helen Mm'zullo

It seems; that li‘cbruary is the month of
domes . . . and the Lamihdas have again
dim-ii and danced at their annual dinner-
(lnm-e. Whlt‘h was; held in the Marine Ball—
room of ‘mo Edgewuter Beach Hotel, last
Saturday, it really was quite an allairi Last
Sunday lino monthly meeting was held
at the home of Halon Mormllo. My, my,
the girls were pretty worried about their
«Hem . , . a sleak dinner at the Edgewater
on Saturday, and e epagheui dinner at the
meeting on Sunday. Oh, well, now you can
start. all over again, girls! Last. Tuesday in
the sorority apartment, me Lumbdas had
their first, rush party of me mason. Lox-mine
Elm-diyk and Dorie Tully had charge of the
menu, which was; very good. Tea, sand-
wiches and cookies; were aerved ‘midsl the
rhythm of music and games. The ”cohooti
wiles" really had the girls Stumped, but not
for long, Lorraine Non-Believer” Anderson
saw to that.

are

 

3’: XX 1?

Kappa Phi Delta, too, is kept as busy as
a bee with rushing parties. Last Wednesday
noon, the girls had a rushing luncheon and
parmok of tasty morsels, some of which
were the result of George’s handiwork in
cutting down the cherry tree. Eileen Halon
inson shouldered the responsibility of en-
tertaining her sorority sisters last Sunday
at their monthly meeting. Seating so many
in her apartment. was such a problem that
the floor war: finally made into the “Kappa
Lounge." As a Home Ec’er, she did herself
proud by preparing “dainties for her cu-
pies.” March 2nd, more food and a play are
in order for the Formal Rush. The girls
will (lon their Sunday best, and step out
into society for the night.

.1. a: or :1:

Signm Ila-Eu 'l‘hem proved its academic
abilities by having a book review at the
Oak Park Library for the aetives and alums.
it‘s a good idea to keep these alums “school-
girlish,” Their monthly meeting will be held
at, Dot Giambelluoa's on March 5, after
which they will go m‘ler skating.

a: 4: a: m

The "same Lewis sororiiy girls” who at-
tended the lnlenFratei‘nityamenity affair
wish to extend their thanks to the Inter-
ll‘ratemily Council for such a grand time.

FERRET [lily 2’55, 191“
wmmmnm

 

lloy, oh boy, oh boy! Only izliroo mom:
nights and we’ll be luwin’ film limo of our
livma swinging? aml swayin” at. film liosmolz
.lunim- Formal «we! Yos nuliil Your olul
SoopovnSnoopon‘ will be right on tlno ball
that. night to swoop up all like ovullalblo
olmalx! (lur- ooorot ugonin will In: smtlonml
behind every poet. :nml there will lno one
under much and (ivory while! So, on guomlli

* wk m :1:

Our predictions on Junior Formal pain
ingot '

Emil Galamluk and Marty
.lolnmy llullum and Lil
()lmi-ile llull and 11m
l’rol’. lfiwisolon- and “Nilelm”
Hurry Doll’l and llotty
Dick Taylor and (lay
Charlie Luclmmon and “Darling"
Boll Then- and “Dollie"
Jolm Hmwogo mull Martha

m an Ila >4:

llillllfill No: 11: Ml filmodgmos noon in Am-
mom- ‘cnl” and Johnny nowhm'u in sight!!!
(Eloy, that. in news!)

on m m we

"Kill" Storm, enstwhlle (lay school regu-
lar, suddenly decided to continue bio studies
in our noteworthy evening division. Now
what we’re wondering is whether that
South Side cutie, Dorothy, who works
nights, might. have had some efi‘ect on this
abrupt change of educational policy! Could
he. piehqoush!!!

m )3: m a:

Comes the revolution, and all these ario
locmts will be out out of commission! 1-! are
a guy has to live like Old Scrooge himself
for almost a half a year so he 7cm scrape up
enough Shekels to go to the Formal, and
this guy Steve Bodnm- gives his lassie a
50 (mole wrist-watchl! Not only that, but he
mic/cs he?“ up daily at 2 AM. at the Hostess
Cake 00. Brother, that's low: . . . and I do
mmm love! God]!

44 av m m

Ell/Willi No. 2: .lolmny (mulillflt make it.
muse. he was wrestling . . . No, no, we moon
up In the gym?!

e a: 2a 24

Personal to the Fifth Columnist: Just
between you and me, how long do you sup-
pose you can keep on writing that trite
tripe and get away with it! There’s a new
managing board now. sweetheart, which
sorta coolm your goose! First class material
only, you know what I mean?

:4: an a: m

Softly sailing into the land of nod, Norton
F‘erbe'r left the 'realms of Prof. Penn’s one
o’clock strength class. Prof Penn [mowing
of the great deficiency in sleep that is the
lot of engineering students, let him sleep.
The class quietly left a], two and a 00.07)
class came in. Non‘on waking up at 2:20
heard a prafessofl: voice lecturing so he
paid no head. Upon opening his eyes he
perceived a strange instructor and class
.90 he promptly shook himself awake. After
a hurried apology, amid cheers and jeers,
he left.

>7! iii 9% >Z<

Some like it hot! George “Cookie" Mamm-
ek was generously beslowing a kiss upon a
lovely red head. During several brief in-
termissions from this entertaining pastime,
he picked up Anne, a luscious dark (not
black) beauty, who insisted voon calling
him “Cookie,” After seeing this wonderful
demonstration, it was decided Lhen and
there that “Cookie” should be the honorary
president, of the l.l.’l‘.W.A. 'With tears in
his eyes he said, “Gee, thanks fellows and
oh, gosh! Anne and I are going to be mar-
ried." (Ed. Note: Not if she saw you with
that red head, you won’t”)

9!: 1!C )5: I5:

So now (leap friends We shall close with
a “bang?" As (lid limo nope]:- prodnculon
“Fir-om; Page.”

:BOOE’ERflNUOEPERfi

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