Page Two Armour Tech News Student Publication of the ARMOUR INSTITUTE OF TECHNOLOGY CHICAGO, ILLINOIS . Published Weekly During the College Year / “Lot A?“ "”4” mum on Single Copies, 10 Cents Each MANAGING BOARD Editor-in—Chicf .............. Norman E. Colburn, Jr. Managing Editor . . . . . . .Harold W. A. Davidson Sports Editor ..Raymond A. Fleissncr Business Manager .............. . . . Clarence Clarkson I Walter Hendricks Faculty Advisors . . . . . . . . . . . . . . William W. Culvert i Eldon C. Grafton $2.00 Per Year EDITORIAL DEPARTMENT News Editor .. ......... E. N. Sear] Copy Editor .. .E. G Avery Rewrite ...... ......... .......E 0. Meacham Associate Editors .................... L. J. Beckman, R. L. Ellis and 0. P. Freilinger. Columnist. . . . .. . . .......... . . .J. A. Bacci Reporters ............................ C. R. Bristol, F. D. Cotterman, J. B. Davis, P. A. D’Arco, J. J. Doudera, A. J. Dreis, C. L. DuSell, S. L. Ender, E. W. Engstrom, F. L. Fraizer, J. Galandak, H. A. Geeraerts, G. F. Graham, A. Highman, C. E. Hillman, M. Holland, J. F. Humiston, B. W. Johnson, R. R. Johnson, L. F. Kacel, R. S. Kercher, R. Knabc, W. F. Kracmer, V. J. Kropf, ARMOUR TECH NEWS win wwww WV: . ”The Slipstick M i s «aw Cleave to “The Slipstlck"; let the Slapstick fly where it may. i mmmummmm m. mmmm m. Back again, work again, play again, slide again, be« hind again, dig again, in order that we may smile again. And so it goes. But just the same we‘re all glad to hop right into the old schedule and keep knocking them off until Christmas comes along. For the time being let’s hop into some assorted and diversified humor (‘1) just in case you have something important to think about at the moment. .1. .x a Medical Prof.: “Substances which affect or neutralize the efl’ects of certain poisons are called what?" Student: “Chasers!" :k 5* EA Boss: “Thanks for staying overtime.” Stcnog.: “Don’t mention it. The fervor was all mine.” Engineer: ”How did you find things over in India?” Traveler: “Fine and Ghandi.” 1k >l< 1! An owl isn’t really wise; he just keeps his mouth shut and looks knowing. 3k W $ J. Land, J. Laskiewicz, F. Leason, H. Levin, N. E. 13.: “What makes you think my head is made of McGuone, J. K. Morrison, H. S. Nachman, D. J. cork?” Neal, A. J. Ragan, M. B. Stevens, D. Suhr, D, M. E.: “It always seems to be at the neck of a bottle." C. Timberlake, L. P. Wcrlein, and G. Zwissler. * * * SPORTS DEPARTMENT THE CIVIL ENGINEER Associate Editor ........ . ............ ' D. Armsbury He’s 3 Chap in SPUtleSS khaki Reporters ..... . ........... ....W B. Ahern, HE’S a chap in corduroys, M. Holland, J. O. Larson, E. F. Mczcra, O. Tomei. He's a chap with trousers damaged in the rear He’s a man of fashion’s stamp BUSINESS DEPARTMENT (also a rag-a-mulfin tramp), Circulation Managers . . . J. E. Schreincr E. A. Svoboda And he’s known from York to Frisco Advertising Manager ..................... R. J. White Asst. Advertising Manager ................ R. H. Hedin Business Assistants .......... J. R. Adcr, E. F. Dudley, G. E. Myers, J. T. Paslawski, E. Simek, F. A. Wcrtzler. Vol. Xll DECEMBER 12, 1933 No. 12 The Students Should Be informed There are several rumors circulating that the school is going to move. The professors have all received a letter giving them a small idea of de- velopments but the students have been told nothing. We have found out the administration is studying every possible method of improving the school but no actual plan to move has been decided upon. The main thing that interests the students is the possibility of moving the school. At first thought all are heartily in favor of the move tol “anywhere else but here.” But after a little con» ‘ sidcration qualifications and exceptions spring up. It finally comes out that most are eager to move if the move means a campus and new build— ings. But they are afraid that the move means a. building in the loop and final degeneration to a “business college” or adult school, where greaterl attention is given to the night school than the‘ day school; where a person comes to take in his spare time some one or two subjects which will help him in his work. With the shortening of working hours comes a real need for the adult school in metropolitan districts but the students need have no fear that Armour’s will be of any , more than secondary importance. If any plan to radically change the School is decided upon the opinion of the students should be obtained before the final decision is reached. , The school belongs more to the students than to the Board of Trustees and the students should be considered first in any plan of development. For Future Pep Meetings Armour’s commodious lunch room has been suggested as a site for coming pep meetings in preference to Assembly Hall, which is so large that the small group of cheering Techawks seems lost in its vastness. The brightness of the lunch room’s colors would lend a new life to the meetings while the students might recline at the tables playing cards or eating as they joined in the festivities. Professor Schommer has announced his will- ingness to deliver speeches from atop the serving counter, remarking that such a procedure would tend to enliven things. The serving of beer, how- ever, has been condemned by the Deans, so this source of gaiety will not be available. At the last pep meeting so many students mis- took the crowd in the lunch room for the pep meeting that only a few reached Assembly Hall. Because of the above condition, the News has deemed it advisable to recommend that future pep assemblies he held in the Student Union. As the Civil Engineer. His morals may be shady And his language somewhat rough, He may have a vulgar hankering after bccr, But that’s just a sort of shell. He will stick with you through H...l Like a pretty decent fellow, Like a Civil Engineer. “California Engineer. a as First Med. Student: “I‘m going,r to be a surgeon." Second Med. Student: “Not for me. Too much inside work." 'l' ill 2‘ Prof.Ensz:“D’Alba are you real busy?" Louie: “Yes sir, very." Prof. Ensz: “You don't look it. What are you doing?’ Louie: “Trying to make a discovery.” Prof. Ensz: “What is it?” l.. D’Alba: “How long a fellow can rest before you notice him." 1F 4!. 7! Chem. Prof.: “Define clicrvesccnce." Studc: “Oh, it’s 9. foaming, bubbling . . . . Prof.: “No, that’s beer.” 1?: 4% ’rI‘ He: “I haven't the cheek to kiss you." She: “Use minc.” =I< 4‘ 3? Electricity l’rof.: “Never touch any live wires with your hands." Brightie: “Oh, I see, everything sanitary." a: 1i: it He: “You are the sole aim of my life.” She: “You’ll never score a hit if you don't get closer to the target.” .1: i: :1: Breathcs there a man with soul to dead, Who never to himself hath said, As he bumped his toe against the bed, “l!!! 7??? "“ PL?” Suman: “What makes that red mark on your nose?" g Woodsman: “Glasses.” l Suman: ”Glasses of what?” ‘ >r “Have you ever been through Calculus?" inquired the prof. “Not unless I passed through at night,” replied the ‘i'rosh, “I’m from Kansas, you know.” ; 4' =1" 514 i First Fresh: “1 just got a zero.” . Second Fresh: “That’s nothing.” i First Frosh: “I know it." 5.6 ’1' >‘F Then there was the sweet young thing who thonglll that a baltcry charger was an. artillery horse. And in. the same breath we might mcnlion the song of the 1m- cmnloycd deep ecu fisherman, “Barracuda spare a dime?" :l: Vl- '4’- The contrib situation is very, very bad fellows, of course we don't need the dam things but i’s the idea of appreciative readers, you know. How about a little l note some time maybe? :5 1% '»1< Junkman: Any rope, paper, or old iron? Student (simply): I’m a college student. Junkman: My mistake. Any bottles? a :1: “Were you cool during- the battle?” asked the fair one of her hero. “Cool, did you say? Why I was so cool I was actual- ly shivering,” honestly, if not modestly, returned her 8T0. l l l See you anon. J. A. B. illlll S'l‘llhll’l SHOWN. ”r WMMWM ..Thc paper medal for the prize boner of the week goes to SONNY WElSMANN. SONNY timed the basketball game with George Wild liams College and only mode the first half seven minutes too long! Scz we, “Lord, you made the half too long.” If the fellow that wanted his ATAA money back—at the assembly Wednesday—~will come to the News office, we'll have Ray Pflum, and Coach Kraflt, and Scliommer, and the News stall’ pitch in and pay him his dough. We’ll call his bluff. DlAMOND DICKEY desires a complete vindication (whatta word, whattn word). DICKEY admits writ- ing only one of tho poems in the lust Slap Stick and further insists that the others were written sometime in the your lo 13. D. (BEFORE DICKEY). Since ROSIE [.ANG~——lhe Mechan- ical Girl—Jute gone to Switzerland, CLAUDE says that VIC CAMSKY no longer infcsls the Mechanical of- fice. VIC misses his Swiss, etc. etc. Pi Nu Epsilon celebrated their initiation by attending a current theater attraction—«The Battered Bride. The question is, however, where were Floissner and Davidson during the third act of the play. (Incidentally, two ushercttes were off duty at the time.) They claim that they were trying;r to buy back the, ”Bride" before it was too late. HERB KREISMAN says, “There’s nothing like washing; down a Mech Lab lecture with some “good stuff.” May we suggest garlic instead of chewing gum for dessert, Herb? DANNY MULLANE has masteh minded the problem of the wolf and the doom in chem. lab. “Just take the doors oil," sez DAN—and suits the action to the word. Anyone want to buy a door? George Olufiicn and "Tad” Omiecimlzi have made their New Year‘s resolutions early. No more choir lilting in calm—fur a while, anyway. meiélm News l There seems lo be a decided at- mocphcrc of charclting in Amt wmp of late. Consequently "niggem" will be much in demand when. the seniors rccl off their current projects, “A Clly Plan.” Senior-g also find their spare mo- ments wcll filled with thoughts of size], concrete, border designs, clot, clo.,. .. .. .Who said women? Prof. A. C. Wilmanns gave his con- struction enthusiasts quite a treat last week by substituting for his classes a lecture by Mr. R. S. Phil- lips oi? the Portland Cement Associa~ tion. Mr. Phillips’ talk was illustrat— ed with motion pictures. Last Saturday was a big day for our class B archs. These juniors had made the most of their time and pre— sented to the jury the best set of “Athletic Buildings” that ever were, or will be designed. The sophs also considered that Saturday was their big day because their athletics buildings were NOT due. Did you say . . . scotch rye and wines are in the air! Well, you’re right as three peas in a pod. This ler. rible malady hasn’t as yet affected CORD/ES, PFENDT and seven of their class mates, who received first mention, second mention and men- tions, in these order, on their log- gins, The highest award in form of mention commended was given to EVANS in a recent judgment of the “Entrance Way.” Have you noticed, how he’s “clicking”? Salitla, Phillips, Schmaltz, K'ich- mmn and Brahm- rated on a. re- ccni frosh charcoal judgment. Seems they have SPOTTED THE RIGHT CAST’ And the basketball tournament is under full swing....may the best team win! l Did I hear some one say the juniors have as good as won it? E. E. Sarah Trouble Ampere-turns given, flux determine the That is our problem, now isn't it nuts? Assume a flux Phi in the leg we call K, Then calculate B by dividing by A. Next we find H from plate 59, Which shows their relation by means of a line, Now multiply H by the length of the circuit; This gives the force that is needed to work it, The force that is needed to put Phi through K So far so good, three cheers for tho dayl Now F in K equals F in J ’Causc the two are in parallel, (that's what they say). So do the reVerse of that done for K And wind-up with Phi, the flux in part J. Now adding Phi K that we found before To the Phi in part J, gives the flux in the core. From this we part C, The force to produce the flux we called Phi. Now the force in part C plus the force in part .I Should equal N I, if all is O. K.; But if it, doesn‘t, there’s one thing to do, Keep changing check can find the force in flux K until true. they It's easy to guess—when the an- swer’s in the book ’Cause it's easy to sneak just one little look. And after we’re finished kind of blue We thank the good Lord, that at last we are through. By E. J. Kirsch. and feel Tuesday, December [2, “933 A..l£l3.l§. Hear lewo- Spec/hers Friday “The Manufacture and Use of Ae— curate Measuring Instruments” was the subject of a speech given before the A. I. E. E. last Friday. Mr. Em- erick and Mr. Welch oi‘ the Leeds Northrup Company were the speak~ crs. The meeting was called to order by President Lehmann and Richard Friede introduced the speak— crs. Diagrams involving certain con~ nections were used along with pic- tures to show typical laboratory set ups for calibration and measuring. Many illustrations were given of the layout and use—4n steam generating stations, hydro electric plants, and similar power applications—of the apparatus designed for power work. An instrument designed to give temperature measurements of elec‘ trical apparatus was demonstrated. This instrument. combines the prin. ciple of the thermo-couple and the potentiometer in accurate measuring- instruments. The talk was directly in line with: the work in electrical engineering. The students were familiar with the principles involved. but the applica» tions were new and unusual. Plans are being: perfected for three additional talks. probably to be held after the holidays. These will be about the very latest devel- opment in electronic applications. Pictures from the A. I. E. E. smok- cr are on sale by J. Bard of the junior class. TRlGONOGRAl’l—l s all functions in one op- eration to 8-4 places of. o es: Right and Oblique Trinnnlcs. Multi- plicntlolls. Division-is, it, Proportions. Stress and * other problems in Me- chanics. ‘ made clear {or the shutout. lower for Instructors nnd Checkers. inc . e Cnrdbmu‘d 500. Nun-wurning’ l'yl'nlin $1.50 Postpaid. I. S RONAY £93.. 254 Cleveland. Ohio Almerlcuh favorite EiHOR’l‘ CUT, KONG wlhTfithéClE Miles shrink when you turn to Long Distance telephone service. You can get “there and back” in record time. Improvements are constantly fitting the service more and more closely to the public’s needs. Faster connections, higher quality transmission. “bargain hours” after 8:30 P. M. Business today finds Long Distance a reliable and economical short cut to sales. You’ll find it a pleasant short cut back home. BELL SYSTEM WHY NOT SAY “HELLO" TO MOTHER AND DAD? -— RATES ARE LOWEST AFTER 8:30 P. .\'l. t