Page Two ARMOUR TECH NEWS Tuesday, May l9, l93lfi rind . Tull Student Publication of the ARMOUR INSTITUTE OF TECHNOLOGY CHICAGO, ILLINOIS Published Weekly During the College Year fifilfiflf-fi) Assoc UNION raw" 'couror Nth/warms SUBSCRIPTION RATES Single Copies, 10 Cents Each MANAGING BOARD Editor-in—Chief ....... .Wilbur I-I. Rudolf, ’32 Managing Editor. . . . .Max J. Schmke, ’32 News Editor. . . . . .Edward W. Carlton, ’32 Business Manager Faculty Adviser. . . . . . . . . . ADVISORY BOARD Advisory Editor ................ Fred B. Attwood, ’31 ‘Alvin B. Aucrbach, ’31 ' Arthur H. Jens, ’31 (Frank W. Spalding, ’31 $2.00 Per Year .Professor Walter Hendricks Advisory Associates. . . . . . . . EDITORIAL DEPARTMENT Feature Editor ................ J. R. Jackson, Jr., ’32 Fraternity Assistant. . . . . ...... Harold Bodinson, ’33 Architectural Assistant. . . .W. W. Davies, ’33 Art Assistant ...... . . . Dave Chapman, ’32 Reviews ............... . . .Morton Fagen, ’32 Columnist. . . . . . . . . . . .. .. George Bonvallet, ’32 Assistant News Editor. . . . . . . nett, ’33 Copy Editor ....................... Wilkie, ’32 , J. B. Dirkers, ’32 Assmtants. . ............ { J. W. Juvinall, ,33 SPORTS DEPARTMENT Sports Editor ....... . ............. H. P. Richter, ’32 Associate Editor ................ .C. Stempkowski, ’33 Reporters N. E. Colburn, ’34 H. W. Davidson, ’34 H. L. Gibson, ’34 W. Krol, ’34 D. F. Landwer, ’34 J. P. McGuan, ’34 C. H. Fox, ’32 H. F. Becker, ’33 E. E. Eberth, ’33 S. T. Leavitt, ’33 R. J. Mulroney, ’33 F. W. Paine, ’33 R. F. Rychlik, ’33 V. Rimsha, ’34 E. G. Avery, ’34 J. A. Scheyer, ’34 BUSINESS DEPARTMENT Advertising Manager ................. M. A. Collick, ’32 Assistants R. E. Nelson, ’33 W. L. Bengston, ’32 Circulation Manager ................. J. S. McCall, ’32 Assistants E. II. Chun, ’32 J. F. Bonnell, ’34 R. Dufour, ’33 L. Marcus, '34 C. B. Sommers, ’33 T. C. Peavey, ’34 J. A. Bacci, ’34 C. T. Seaberg, ‘34 Vol. VII MAY 19, 1931 No. 14 “Nothing is old but the mind.” —Ralph Waldo Emerson, Born May 25, 1803. To the Visitors The faculty, the student body, and the Armour Tech News welcome you to the annual Open House Night ex- hibitions. The programs are numerous and varied and we hope that there may be something of interest to each one. All of us, faculty members and students, enjoy giving the Open House Night exhibits and are ready to assist in any way possible to make the evening pleasant and successful. It is probable that the Armour spirit is shown no- where more clearly than in these exhibits because they alone hold the interest of the entire student body. The athletic teams are well supported by a certain type of student, the inter—fraternity sports are of considerable interest to the fraternity men, the interclass competitions are attended by some groups, but Open House Night is participated in by all. The reason for this is rather self-evident. All Armour students are interested in either art or science and both are represented in the exhibits. Many of the displays are tended or operated by students whose chief interest lies in that particular field. So do not hesitate to ask about anything that interests you or that you do not understand. The men in charge are students and consequently cannot be considered as absolute authorities, but they will be glad to answer you to the best of their ability and information. If you care to see scientific apparatus in use go to the physics laboratory in Chapin Hall. Numerous tests are being made there and the students performing will gladly explain them if you ask. Or if chemistry is your hobby the main building should satisfy your wants. The south part of the third floor and the entire fourth floor are filled with chemical exhibits of various kinds. If electrical apparatus and tests interest you, make your way to the first or second floor laboratories in the main building. There you will find numerous tests being made, meters of various kinds being used and all the other things that delight the electrically minded individ- ual. And so on through the list of displays. If you prefer tests of strength, you may watch machines in the base- ment of the main building that will pull, bend or tWIst steel and measure the force at which the specimen fails. Or if your tastes are of a literary or artistic nature the. display of architectural drawings in the lobby or the collection of rare books in the library should be of inter- est to you. But wherever you go, we want you to feel at home. If there is anything you do not understand, ask about it and we will do our best to explain it to your complete satisfaction. The exhibits are given for your entertain- ment and we hope that they are successful in reaching their goal. W. H. R. vww E “The Slipstickw Cleave to “The Slipstick”; let the Slapstick fly where it may. www‘ww‘u‘ mw'vww *I ”W renaisshss Ms “Sham Ammmnmmkm m p. THE PROM In the. spring of the year Comes the prom, my dear. ’Tis a time of joy I. For the girl and boy Who spend their time In its rhythm and rims. The band is hot The weather not, The floor is slick And young minds click. Time is a whirl For the boy and girl—"- We all agree— The prom—ALT. —-Boyd. SEND IN A CONTRIBUTION Ladies and gentlemen: Being as it is customary for us to take one day off per year in which to relax and do our juice homework, we hereby announce and call out a holiday, this day to be celebrated next Tuesday. This holiday is to be Contributor’s Day,” an event celebrated by all other good colyums. Send in your worst jokes of the year. The one who sends in the worst joke will receive a handsomely en— graved doodad. Thank you, and R.S.V.P. . SEND IN A CONTRIBUTION Dominating senior chemical (to weeping girl friend): What are your tears to me but a few droplets of a dilute solution of sodium chloride!” -—Wattsit Tuhyuh; SEND IN A CONTRIBUTION WARNING “DANGER, 100,000 VOLTSl! TOUCH! THESE WIRES AND YOU ARE A DEAD MAN. ANY PER- SON FOUND SO DOING WILL BE PROSECUTED TO THE FULLEST EXTENT OF THE LAWN" SEND IN A CONTRIBUTION Joe (yeh, he's a dumb freshman) asks: “Say, who’s this guy ‘Bye’ who plays in all the tennis tournaments and never wins a game, although he often reaches the semifinals?” SEND IN A CONTRIBUTION We overheard a personal conversation last night, dur- ing one of the Open House exhibits. It seems that a student introduced his father to his math professor whdm he had accidentally met. The parent anxiously inquired if his son were being ‘wcll grounded in calculus." In reply the professor said that he could put it even more strongly; that the boy was “actually stranded in it.” slots—rim trooper . bllhhk’llls no scrum Stan Livingstone Refuses to Talk Chicago, May 19. A rumor which has of late dis- turbed the campus has it that “The Co-ed” is not a stu- dent at the Institute. A statement from The Bongineer says that he refuses to believe such a rumor and attaches no importance to any such talk concerning such an ,ilu lustrious contributor to his column. ,‘ When privately interviewed, Stanley Livingstone, who knows the entire circumstances, refused to divulge his knowledge. The local detective squad has been put on the trail in an attempt to clear the matter. If the rumor be found the annual colypm banquet the annual colyum banquet will be revoked and all other privileges refused. SEND IN A CONTRIBUTION ONCE A CUSTOMER—«ALWAYS A CUSTOMER Tell your relatives and friends to die this week—local mummifier quotes caskets are being lowered, with grave— yard lots at dirt prices. SEND IN A CONTRIBUTION A Lean Story “I once ate ten pounds of beef." “Aw, that’s a lotta bull!” —Rad. SEND IN A CONTRIBUTION * RESULTS GUARANTEED . . . and doctor, you’re sure I have pneumonia? You know some pneumonia patients die of consumption.” “Never fear. You may be assured that when I treat a pneumonia patient, he dies of pneumonia.” u —Skill. SEND IN A CONTRIBUTION TI-lEYSAY'I‘I-IATBASEBALLISNOTONTHESQUARE ANDWEASKHOWCOMEANDTHEYSAYHOWCOULDIT WHENITISONTHEDIAMOND. SEND IN A CONTRIBUTION PIECEWORK PAYS “Ych! lie gets one hundred bucks a night playing his fiddle. Imagine, twenty-five bucks a string.” “Why doesn’t he play a harp?" SEND IN A CONTRIBUTION “May I have the last dance?” ”You had it last week.” SEND IN A CONTRIBUTION And the gentleman in charge of the Tesla coil ex— periment told us confidentially that he was not advci ’ ing‘ any spark plug with the seven»and~a»half-foot spark. See you Friday eve at the Knickerbocker. I ~~nTlIe Bonginocr. F. P. E. S. Smoker Was Held Thursday Last Thursday evening at 8 o’clock the annual Fire Probection Engineer— ing Society smoker was held at the Phi Kappa Sigma house. Ice cream and cake were the refreshments of the evening, and smokes were en- joyed, in addition to the card play— ing. ‘ The faculty was represented by Professors J. B. Finnegan and C. P. Holmes—J. V. Parker, W. R. Townley, Cal Johnson, and “Mike” of Underwriters Laboratories being guests of the evening. Professor Finnegan spoke on the history of the department. Each year Salamander, the hon- orary F. P. E. fraternity, awards a handbook on fire protection engineer" ing to the freshman student in the department having the highest aver- age in his previous freshman year. Carl Clanton was the recipient of this year’s award. Johnson Gains Civil Engineer Membership E. A. Johnson, ’31, has been awarded the Honorary Junior Mem— bership given each year by the Illi- nois section of the American Society of Civil Engineers. This membership is awarded each year to the graduating student in civil engineering in Illinois, who has an outstanding record in scholar- ship and general ability. Senior Announcements Distributed on Monday Announcements for the senior graduation, probably will be distrib- uted Monday, May 25 at the desk of the main building. Those who have not placed their order, may do so now. If a sulfi- cicnt number orders the announce- ments special attention may have them ready in due time. instructor in Forge Shop Sprains Ankle Claude Blankenship, assistant in— structor in the forge shop, suffered a painful but not serious accident rc- oently, while he was working in the shop. He stopped on a short length of pipe, left on the floor by some stu— dent, and lost his balance. Upon rising to his feet, he found that one ankle refused to function properly and further investigation proved it to be sprained. Exhibitions to Show Departments’ Work (Continued from page 1) and automobile engines will be shown for inspection. The materials testing laboratory in the basement. of the main building at the north end will conduct tests on construction materials. Architecture Drawings and plans made by stus dents of architecture will be on dis- play in the lobby of the main build- ing. Many of these have won prizes in various contests. Physics Laboratory Experiments will be conducted all evening in the laboratories in Chapin Hall. The use of the apparatus will be explained in detail to Visitors. In addition experimenting will he car- ried out in Science Hall, third floor, main building by a group of stu— dents under Professor Wilcox. Foundry About 8:30 molten iron will be poured in the foundry on the fourth floor of Machinery Hall. Before that time demonstrations of core- making and molding will be carried on. Wood Shop Wood turning and pattern making will be demonstrated on the third floor of Machinery Hall. Machine Shop The second floor, Machinery Hall, contains the machine shops where work will be going on throughout the evening. Forge Shop Freshman steel forgets will hold forth in the shop on the first floor of Machinery Hall. A continuous anvil chorus will entice visitors to Jenter and see the brawny black— smiths, better called metal treaters. are; NEWS THE BOULEVARD CAFETEREA 3lst Street and Mich. Ave. Dining and Dancing from 3 P. M. to Midnight No Cover Charge It won’t be long now! In a “busi- ness conference” in the architectural office, Mr. Suter and the massicrs of the various classes, with the excep- tion 01' the freshman class, suc- ceeded in locating a place to hold a banquet and paddle the freshmen for their initiation. The date chosen is May the twenty-seventh, 8. Wed- nesday, and the place is the Lin» coln Park Refectory. With Lincoln Park at our disposal, more or less, it gives the freshmen a chance to “gambol merrily over the rolling greens.” With the upperclassmen’s aid at the paddles we’re sure a good time will be had by everybody P3: 4* Y! The juniors finished cheretting' last Tuesday, in a final spurt, and the “Libraries for collectors” took to judgment. After the smoke had cleared away, it came to light that F‘alma had succeeded in solving the- problem by achieving a first mention. it- c at During the past week the sopho- nmres have been completing a prob», lem; consequently they have been staying down nights. A few decided to attend the State Street dance last Wednesday and so accordingly they muscled through the crowd. But poor Frank Dubsky. In one block he had‘ his pockets picked twice. But when he informed us there was nothing in them, well. . . .whi’tc carnations- please! STUDENT'S FATHER DIES N. G. Skoularinas, (3.13., ’32, suf- fered the loss of his father last week. Mr. Skoularinas was in poor health for over a year. Special Student Rate 3 4. MONTHS for $3250 f Re.....L°.Z§"£§‘"§”§i§li§§§'3 Remington Portable 3 mo. $7.50 AMERICAN WRITING MACHINE CO, Inc. (Established 1880) Free delivery. Satisfaction guaranteed. 329 So. Dearbom Street Telephone Harrison 2424 IOIN ITS IN THE GENERAL ELECTRIC PROGRAM, BROAD- CAST EVERY SA’I'L‘RDAY EVE~ NING ON A NATION-JVIDE N.B.C. NETWORK @Ehll‘lhihl. rlh’fl mar rears“ f TRACK man will tell you that records are broken when the track is fast. Think of this setting—afoul evening, the stands overflowing, the whole spectacle brilliantly lighted with G-E floudlights, and a lost truck—a record simply couldn't stand the “golf" Night-time, when people naturally turn to diversion, is Flt: logical time for a track meet. Lack of support Will be a thing of the past. And just watch the athletic fund grow. G-E fioodlightlng projectors, largely the development of college—trained men, are easily adapted to any occasion whether football, track, tennis, commencement, receptions, m- plays. Eflicient G-E illumination promotes athletics and builds school spirit. Forfurlfwr information cabins: Pzrhis‘cilfir Dapo'n‘mm! (E). Ask for 65.44206 -—- “ch Lt‘gb: The: Starred Sports at Niglu. " $53283 ELEQTNTQ