Page Two massage Tesla discus Student Publication of the ARMOUR ms'rl'rU'rr: OF TECHNOLOGY CHICAGO, lLlLlNOllS Published Weekly During the College Year cartoon association ¢PMIHEK SUBSCRIPTION RATES $2.00 Per Year Single Copies, 10 Cents Each MANAGING sonic—o— Editor-in—Chlef ................. Wilbur H. Rudolf, ’32 Managing Editor.. .......... Max J. Schinke, ’32 News Editor ...... . .Edward W, Carlton, ’32 Business Manager ................. James J. Casey, ’32 ADVISORY BOARD Advisol'y Editor .................. Fred B. Attwood, ’31 Alvin B. Auerbach, ’31 Advisory Associates .......... Arthur H. Jens, =31 Frank W. Spaldlng, ’31 " umrfii‘uAL DEPARWENT Feature Editor ................ John R. Jackson, ’32 Fraternity Assistant ..... .Harold Bodinson, ’33 Architectural Assistant.. ..Earl C. Kubicek, ’32 ’32 ’32 Art Assistant ............ . .Dave Chapman, Reviews ................. ...1Viorton Fagen, Columnist ........... ....Philip Jordan, ’31 Associate Columnist. ..George Bonvallet, ’32 Assistant News Editor ........... Orville T. Barnett, ’33 __________.,_.._.._._.——— SPORTS DEPARTMENT Sports Editor ............. ‘ ........... H. P. Richter, '32 Associate Editor .................. C. Stempkowski, ’32 ________._.___.______,_______._.._.___——-—__ Reporters R. G. Kellner, ’31 R. F. Ryohlik, ’33 J. B. Dirkers, ’32 E. G. Avery, ’34 F. A. Ustryski. '32 H. L. Gibson, ’34 L. G. Wilke, ’32 E. Kane, ’34 J. W. Juvinall, ’33 D. F. Landwer, ’34 S. T. Leavltt, ’33 J. P. McGuan, ’34 R. J. Mulroney, ’33 J. A. Scheycr, ’34 BUSINESS DEPARTMENT Advertising Manager ................... H. Monger ’33 Assistants M. A. Collick ’32 W. L. Bengston ’32 R. 12:. Nelson ’33 Circulation Manager ................. J. S. McCall ’32 Assistants A. Jungels, ’32 S. Anderson, ’32 P. Kesselring, ’31 H. Pilgrim, ’31 R. Dufour, ’33 C. B. Sommers, ’33 E. H. Chan, ’32 H. Bodinson, ’33 A. Myers, ’31 No. 16 Vol. VI FEBRUARY 10, 1931 “You can fool some of the people all of the time, and all of the people some of the time, but you cannot too] all oi the people all of the time.” Abraham Lincoln. Born February 12, 1809. A C W VITIES There is considerable discussion at the present time as to the place of extra—curricula activities in the schools and colleges throughout the country. This does not indicate, however, that there is much objec— tion to student activities as a whole, the opposition being directed especially against those sports or other non-scholastic occupations which are carried to ex— tremes. There is a little unfavorable comment and much whole-hearted support of student enterprises which are carried on in moderation. Activities have several very definite purposes and are a real source of benefit to the student body and to the officers of administration. All activities have a strong tendency to bind the student body of a school and to make of it one unit rather than several wrangling factions. They are a powerful factor in keeping the daily routine of school work from becoming tiresome drudgery. They give rise to and promote friendships among the student associations which are, perhaps, the most valuable part of a college education. Men who engage in school activities have the oppor- tunity to develop character and leadership in them- selves. They learn how to work with other men harmoniously and to co-operate with them in striving towards a definite goal. In short, indulgence in student activities provides a student with the ability to more readily take his place, after graduation, in his chosen field of endeavor, no matter what that field may be. The faculty at Armour, considered as a group, is in favor of sports and other occupations in which the students of the Institute engage. That this is true is shown by the fact that each student enterprise has one or more faculty members directly interested in it. Another proof of this condition is found in the almost unanimous support the faculty has given to student organizations on many occasions. The officers of the school consider activities bene- ficial and in accordance with that belief urge incoming freshmen to engage in whatever student enterprise that appeals to them. Armour offers many activities of many kinds. There are the athletic teams—«basketball, baseball, track, tennis, golf, boxing, swimming, and hockey. There are musical organizations, both vocal and instrumental. There are the engineering or departmental organiza— tions. And there are three publication—the Cycle, the Armour Engineer and the Armour Tech News. With such an array of organizations from which to choose no man should be unable to find something to his taste and to which he is suited. .H ARMOUR TEflH NEWS vvvv wr vwvv WV vvv > H ’ , WEN-lag glgpsllfiltw , Cleave to “The Slipstick”; let the Slapstick fly where it may. >AAAAAAAA AA. AAAAAA MY DREAM" I dreamed a dream next Tuesday week, Beneath the apple trees; I thought my eyes were big pork pies, And my nose was Stilton cheese. The clock struck twenty minutes to six, When a frog sat on my knee; I asked him to lend me fifty cents, But he borrowed a dollar from me. L. W. 16' ll: fit The Bongincer says that school is only a matter of “give and take.” file means give money and take exams. a it s News item 4:00 P. M.——Two Scotchmen go bathing. 4:01 P. BIL—First Scotchman: “I’ll wager you three— pence that I can stay under water longer than you." 4:01-74 P. M.—Second Scotchman: “All right.” 4:02 P. M.——Both submerge. 10:00 P. M.—-The police are still looking for the bodies. ill 5k at Professor (just arrived in dear old Chi.): “Could you tell me, young lady, if the street car runs by the Art Institute?” Sweet Young Thing: tricity." “Why, no sir, it runs by elec- -—Step Hen. $1 ’1 ill Instructor (to girl learning to drive): “Now, when you want to stop you must put on the brakes.” Girl: “Oh! Why I thought the brakes came with the car." Dollar Bill. >11 II it MUST BE Two Irishmen were working on the roof of a build- ing one day when one made a misstep and fell to the ground. The other leaned over and called: “Are yez dead or alive, Mike?" “Oi’m alive,” said Mike feebly. “Faith an’ you’re such a liar that Oi don’t know whither to belave yez or not.” “Well then, Oi must be dead,” said Mike, “for yez would never call me a liar if Oi were alive.” 4| 8' A young freshman dropped in at the News office last Friday eve when we were very busy. He asked lot a job as-tprooireader, altering good references. Aslrffr‘l. if he understood the requirements of that responsl :lc position, he replied: “Oh, sure. Whenever you make mistakes in the paper, just blame ’em on me, and I’ll not say a word.” * it it i Consultation 3 Doctor No. 1: “I operated on him for appendicitus.” Doctor No. 2: “What was the matter with him?" a b :5 Environment WHEN AN AEROPLANE RISES EN PENS- BURGl—l l'll' lS SA“) TO “GO UP EN SMOKI .” w a v.- Sponges The proprietor of a Turkish bath is a man who earns his living by the sweat of your brow. ll! fill # “Jimmie, will you tell us what an average is?” “What a hen lays on.” “Well What on earth are you talking about?" “It says in the book that a hen lays two eggs a day on an average.” Jo Jo. ill #1 I‘B A llot Tune “Good morning, Knave. Hast heard the Fire-Plug song?" “Nay, Variet, how goeth it” “Hydrant I dwelt in marble halls————.” S'r is it NOTICE A certain freshman is said to have left a note on his door for his roommate who had gone to the movies. It read: “If I’m studying when you get back, wake me up.” Jaesmackse. 5k V?- as Travelogue Waitress: “HAWAII, gentlemen? You must be HUNGAR ." First Man: “Yes SIAM and I can’t ROUMANIA long either. WNIC‘E lunch ready?” Waitress: “I’ll RUSSIA to a ANA?” First Man: “NOME, you can wait on us.” Waitress: “I don’t think we FIJI that fast, but ALASKA.” First Man: “Never mind asking anyone. I must put a CUBA sugar in our JAVA." Waitress: “SWEDEN it yourself—I’m only here to SERVIA,” First Man: “DENMARK our bill and call the BOS— PHORUS. He’ll probably KENYA. I don’t BOLIVIA know who I am.” Waitress: “No, and I don’t CARIBBEAN—you guys sure ARMENIA.” Boss: “SAMOA your wisecracks, is it? Don’t GENOA customer is always right? What’s got INDIA?” Do you think maybe this argument ALPS business” Customer: “CANADA racket—SPAIN in the net: ." J. A. L. table. Will you HAV— 9 I? lb Well, alter all the sweat and worry we can sit and rest (‘2) for another semester. Phil J. his caucus race listens asst. By A. ll. JENS- Publieity Mgr. for the A. T. A. A. The Armour Tech Athletic Asso» ciation and Student Union, com- monly known as the A. T. A, A. was founded through the initiative and efforts of Harold W. Munday in 1922. At that time it was felt that there should be instituted at Armour a student association which'would, with the cooperation of the faculty, control any prob— lem that might arise within the student group. The Vital part that the association takes in the student life today proves that such an or— ganization was needed. The asso— ciation has expanded much beyond the expectations of the founders until today the A. T. A. A. fosters athletic teams and contests, spon- ’ Armour Tech Athletic Association: Assisting the Athletic Depart~ ment‘ in arranging schedules, re- ceiving and caring for visiting teams, etc. Membership in this organization is limited to the students, alumni, and faculty of Armour Institute of Technology. Thus, all students who are regularly enrolled at Armour are automatically members of the The management of the associa-‘ tion is vested in a Board of Control. This Board is made up of admin». istrative officers of the Institute, three members of the faculty, and‘ student members. Student officers in the number! of four, with other class repre-I sentatives constitute the active1 board of the A. '1‘. A. A. According to the constitution, there shall be‘ a. president, lst vice president, 2nd vice president, and a secretary. All of these officers are to be elected by the entire student body of the Institute. Candidates are nominat- sors musical concerts and student assemblies, advises and directs publication work and in general assists in all matters pertaining to student life at Armour Institute of Technology. The prime object and duty 01' the association is to develop a unified Armour spirit by: Organizing and systematizing all inter-class relations, and all class customs and privileges; Serving as a means of com« munication between the student body and the faculty; Acting as a Court of Appeal for all sections of classes, members of committees in class activities, or— ganizations, athletics, or any stu- dent; Fostering mass meetings at ap- propriate intervals; Promoting inter—fraternity con— tests; Stimulating interest in athletic contests; @WlEllfilPll laid?» W§ \\\\\\\\\\\\\ l We. 4%» average day must meet the the person making the call. A NATKON wWIDE Bell System service is custom-made. Each of the 65,000,000 telephone calls handled in the Telephone men study a customer’s com— munication needs, then advise the type of equipment that fits them best. For depart- ment stores they may recommend the “order turret” —- a special switchboard for taking orders by telephone. Thus they enlarge the EEML h’i’bl‘EM SYSTEM ed by a nominating committee in the month oi? May when the gen- eral election of officers is held. The officers serve for one year with the exception of the lst vice president who automatically becomes presi— dent oi' the organization. The president at the time of his should be ready to begin his senior year the following September. The 1st vice president and secretary should be sophomore students and should be ready to begin their junior year the following Septem— ber. The 2nd vice president should be completing his freshman year and should be ready to begin his sophomore year the following Sep— tember. The comptroller of Armour Institute shall be the treasurer of the A. T. A. A. There is no definite time set for the meetings of the A. T. A. A., but the group meets three or four times each year as the occasion demands. ”WWW [it Mfldlfimm exact wishes of for brokerage election should be a junior and Tuesday, February iii. 1931 Interuclass and inter—fraternity contests are under the direction of two managers appointed by the president of the A. T. A. A. One of these is to direct inter-fraternity contests, while the other is to care for intermclass contests. It is their duty to arrange schedules, furnish any necessary referees, umpires or judges, draw up any necessary rules, and make any other neces— sary arrangements. , Publicity work is conducted by a student publicity manager who cares for all notices and bulletins of the A. T. A. A. The president of the A. T. A. A. may call the editors of the Armour Engineer, the Cycle, the Armour Tech News, the presidents of the various student organizations, the class presidents, a representative of the faculty, and the officers of the Association together for the pur— pose of consulting on the work of the organization. In this manner a unified spirit is developed in or— ganizations at Armour. On your radio tonight . . . lis- ten to Lorna Fantin, famous numerologist. She’ll tell you how names and dates afiect success in business. love or marriage. A real radio thrill. WBBM and entire columbia network at 8:15 P. M. central standard time (D P. [minus (112.. luc- WU RAW hitting the service to the customers needs store‘s service and simplify ordering for the customer. They develop equipment and plans houses, police departments, nation—wide soles forces —— and all manner of business firms. 0F lNTERuCONNECTlNG The telephone industry continues to grow by fitting its service more and more com» pletely to the user’s needs. For men with insight and the ability to coordinate, the apparmzziry is there! TEXEFEQNES .mu-ash