Page Two meteoric ”tech hiatus Student Publication of the ARMOUR INSTITUTE OF TECHNOLUGY CHICAGO, ILLINOIS Published Weekly During the College Year SUBSCRIPTHON RATES Single Copies, 10 Cents Each THE STAFF MANAGING BOARD Editor—in-Chief ..................... Fred Attwood, ’31 $2.00 Per Year Managing Editors ................ {fifgauiazrga‘i ,31 Business Manager ................ Frank Spalding, ’31 Faculty Adviser ........... Professor Walter Hendricks ADVISORY BOARD Retiring Editor-in-Chief ........... David T. Smith, ’30 Retiring Business Manager ...... Morris 0. Nelson, ’30 NEWS DEPARTMENT News Editor ......................... W. H. Rudolf, Departmental Editors Fraternity ...................... .J. R. Jackson, Organizations ..................... E. W. Carlson, Reporters I. Krawitz, ’33 T. Leavitt, ’33 E. C. Kubicek, ’32 '32 ’32 '33 I. B. Dirkers, ’32 M. Windgrond, '33 R. G, Kellner, ’31 SPORTS DEPARTMENT Sports Editor (Acting) ................ Arthur Jens, Assistant Sports Editor .............. H. P. Richter, Assistants C. Stcmpkowskl, '32 R. F. Rychlik, ’33 R. Mulroney, ’33. ’3 1 ’32 s, '31 Jon M.'James. ’31 C. F. FEATURE DEPARTMENT Feature Editor .................... P. E. Seidelman, Columnist .................... .Philip Jordan, Inquiring Reporter. ..... 0. Barnett, Cartoonist ........... .Dave Chapman, ’32 Feature Writer ...... .C. Blahna, ’31 Staff Photographer ..................... O. R. Murphy ’31 ’31 ’33 MAKE‘UE’ DEPARTMENT Make-Up Editor ..................... M. J. Schlnke, ’32 Assistants G. L. Bonvallet, ’32 F. F. Strassenburg, '31 R. L. Ellis, ’33 BUSINESS DEPARTMENT . , E. A. Scanion, ’32 Advertismg Managers ............... J_ J_ Casey .32 Assistants R. Tufts, '32 C. R. Marsh, ’33 c. A. Erickson, ’32 M. A. Coluck, '32 Circulation Manager .................. A. F. Wilde, '31 Mailing Circulation Manager ......... J. S. McCall, '32 Vol. V. MAY 27, 1930 No. M BANQUETS The last three weeks have seen at Armour a host of banquets. These affairs have been for widely dif» ferent purposes, and yet they, like all such affairs, have one point in common. Banquets, as well as satis- fying the corporeal needs of the men, have served to bring them together for a common purpose. The first two weeks saw a series of interhonorary affairs, which have culminated the period of pledge- ship of the men. The affairs are the recognition of the men, and as a purely social function have served to bring these men into closer harmony. The men must have left the dinner feeling that their associates are a set of “real fellows,” for the congenial and friendly atmosphere of the groups are unmistakable. Likewise, the electrical engineers, through the A. I. E., have staged a successful banquet, wherein the stu- dents and the men in the engineering world have met for a get-together. The men have probably been amazed to find that the members of the faculty are human beneath their forbidding exterior, and that the sedate engineers are still full of the spirit that characterized their college days. This affair must have served to promote a better understanding among the three classes of men. This last week has seen the senior banquet, which was the last gathering of the senior class socially, and an occasion to mark what we undergraduates term “the beginning of the end.” The spirit of comradeship is at its highest on this occasion, for in a short time the men will scatter to the various parts of the coun- try, never to be a closely bound unit again. It is to be hoped that those who can will return to the Alumni affairs, but many will be unable to do so from geo- graphical reasons. The last, and probably one of the most important of all the functions, was the Informal Dinner of the Armour Tech Athletic Association. This banquet, which was given by the association for all the athletes and the heads of the publications, cannot fail to serve as a mark of appreciation by the Institute to the men who have worked hard and long to bring some fame to their Alma Mater. School spirit at Armour is noth— ing to be proud of, and the men have often felt that their work was not appreciated. This banquet, if it does nothing else, will have shown the men that they are recognized as having contributed something to embellish the name of Armour. Each and every affair that has occurred has served itspurpose well; they have furnished entertainment and at the same time, drawn their respective group of men closer together. Coming as they do at the close of the school year, and for some men at the close of their college days, the men cannot fail to feel that their various activities have been well worth while. A. B, A. ARMOUR TECH NEWS V vvvv vavvv‘v like stylised” Cleave to “The Slipstick”; let the Slapstick fly where it may. vv AA. A. A MUD VILLE’ZS PRIDE The slugger went up to bat: “Swing at one,” the coach said with glee, But alas: dear reader, The hard hitting batter swung at three. A AA. A minor» seer- STRHKE THREE. Prof. ( in F. I. P., considering liability): “A boy threw a lighted firecracker into the market, the same failing upon one man’s wares. To protect himself, the seller threw the firecracker across the room where it fell in Mr. Smith’s wares. Mr. Smith activated by the principle of self preservation threw the firecracker away, which exploded in a man’s face putting out his eye.” Stude (baseball fan): “Two assists and a put-out." ma»: ORGANEC DESCLOSURE NO. ZZQ This epistie is presented with the hope of clearing up such mysteries as sponification. mastication, and prognostication. In the case of the last—named proc~ ass a spontaneous pyrometer is connected by oxygen tanks to a chlorplatinic metaphosphor equipped with an estcrilication poilyglot ferrate. Ten urps of televox Juice and three kluds of isopropylhydroxytoleunum extract of phenylisocyanatedifunnel europa (often called trycarhoxylic—pyridine—napthosol-isothycanofl— glumbinski for short) are smeared on the sample which has been mistreated with a concentrated solu» tion of hydrogen oxide (l-LO). The resulting compex is exposed to the Dauber Process and finally to the J ckyil—Hyde Process for nitric acid. An inkling of car- bolic hypocrite is dropped into the mixture and an ounce of HOOCH exploded. The domino-compounds are removed by means of a horse—shoe shaped pcr~ manent wave and the periodic table confiscated, as it should have been long ago. The hydrogenation method of fructose calibration is then applied, the results recorded in a stiff cover notebook, which can be procured at Stanley's, and then the notebook placed in a dish of aqua regia. If you flunk the course you‘re just as well off, be- cause you wouldn’t know anything anyway. “The Bongineer. moo “Hello," called a feminine voice over the telephone, “is this the Humane Society?" “Yes," was the reply. “Well, there’s a book agent sitting in a tree, teasing my dog." x! {1 $ “You wouldn‘t cash a check for your own brother, huh? Well, I suppose you know your family better than I do." it 0 $3 Mamie: Nora: Mamie: “How’s your new fellow?" “Not so good.” “You always were lucky." our MflRE HGLIDA Y With shorter hours that claim our praise, To higher hopes we move. With such a lot of holidays, Our golf may yet improve. 8‘ 0 G "Congratulate me. My son is taking medicine at college." “That’s too bad. How long has he been sick?” 9; ’I 7}! Father: “I want you to be a girl that people will look up to.” Daughter: “I’d rather be one that they look around at.” >3? ii} 5.: FAMOUS SATENGS “Silence is more eloquent than words,” said the stu— dent as he forgot his speech. a: ll! >3: WE TURN THE WHERE CREEK Dear Colum: For thirteen years I’ve tried to make “The Line,” “The Wake,” “Hit or Miss,” and other colyums. But I never succeeded; not even once. Then I tried “The Slipstick" and made it right off the bat. You must be pretty rotten. Yes? Orville. >i= in wt: Dean: “No one is allowed to drive an automobile under 21 years 01 .” 96 'B it Big Meat Man: “Hurry up Jimmy; break the bones in Mr. Blots’ chops and put Mr. Smith’s ribs in the basket for him." Little Meat Boy: “All right, sir, as soon as I have sawed off Mrs. Murphy‘s legs." 9,. s a Willis “1 am the third of six children." “You don’t look like two people to me.” 4,: I: >i= They can't call us freshmen very much longer. fact, only two weeks. Oh boy! Oh joy! In Phil J . Sophomore Eiectrioals Weir instrument Fiona” Observance of the manufacture of electrical instruments and allied equipment occupied the attention of the sophomore electricals, last Friday afternoon, May 23, on an inspection trip. The Jewell Electrical Instrument Company, located at 1640-50 Wal— nut street, was the plant visited. The operation of lathes and presses in the manufacture of the D’Arson- val type of meter was first inspected followed by a View of the assem- blage of these manufactured parts. Another use of bakelite in the electrical field is the molded meter cases and parts. The Jewell com— pany finds that in production, a case can be made more economical— ly from bakelite than from metal. The sophs subsequently saw how the bakelite was transformed from a powdered form into a polished solid by heat and a pressure of a ten per square inch. The winding of coils, the calibra- tion of the finished meters, the in— spection of pivots, and methods of soldering and wiring were some of the many interesting features viewed. On the forenoon of Friday, John H. Miliar, Chief Engineer, visited Armour Institute to give the sopho— mores a talk on the theory and dc~ sign of electrical instruments. He pointed out at this time that the electrical instrument is not ab~ solute and that it draws energy when placed in the electrical cir— cult. Mr. Millar said that real engi- neering consists in economically manufacturing an article. In other words an engineer is “one who can do something for one dollar that anyone can do for two.” ”elaboration sores ' META Pill The senior farewell party, held Saturday, May 24, at the Chapter House, climaxed a very successful social year, for Beta Chapter. The house was artistically decorated throughout and brought forth praise from everyone. The flve~ piece orchestra, which featured the evening’s entertainment, was a fit~ ting swan song for the departing seniors. Wednesday, May 21, a banquet was held in celebration of winning the interfraternity track meet. Professor Mangold spoke on this occasion and at the conclusion of the banquet, Brother “Von" Miran was presented with a new tennis racquet. l’l’ril KAPPA SlGMA Friday. May 23rd, the three ac- tive chapters of Phi Kappa Sigma, located in Chicago, entertained their dads at a Father and Son’s Banquet, which was given in the Grand Ball Room of the Hotel La Salie. Everybody thoroughly en- joyed the unusually attractive pro— gram which was presented. The Annual Picnic is to be held June 1, at Starved Rock, on the banks of the Illinois River. RHO DELTA RHO Rho Delta Rho closed their so— cial season for the your with a dim ner~dance held at the Hotel Knick— erbocker. The affair was a bril~ liant success and a fitting climax to one of the most successful seasons the fraternity has ever known. Max flashes, the graduating Mas~ ter Frater, was presented with a key as a token of esteem for his leadership. Tuesday, May .27, 193K? .SEGMA Ali‘HA-‘Mfi Sigma Epsilon of Sigma Alpha Mu is planning a Dinner—Dance and farewell party for the seniors to be given at the Edgewater Beach Hotel, Wednesday, June 11th. This allair will be a summer for- mal. Several of the boys went down to Illinois to visit Rho chapter there during the Illinois Interscholastics. They reported that the track meet was one of the best that they had ever seen. THETA. Xi The annual Spring picnic was held at the Indiana Dunes State Park last Sunday, May 25th. About twenty-five couples ate breakfast at the chapter house and departed in private cars for the dunes at eight-thirty. Fraternity Tennis; Teams Resume Playoff Armour’s inter-fraternity tennis teams, after remaining idle for 2 weeks, have again resumed action in the fraternity tennis champion- ship drive. To date two more we liminary contests are in store, fol- lowing which are the semi-finals and final. By virtue of their victory over Sigma Alpha Mu, the Phi Pi Phi’s will meet the S. K. 11’s. The win- netr of this match will meet the Triangles, conquerors of K. D. T. in the Division A semin‘final. Delta Tau Delta’s victory over Rho Delta Rho places them in the semi-finals of Division B against Theta X: the winner of the Phi Kappa Sigma meet. All meets will be held this week. Managers oi? the respective team will decide on the dates. gnhserihe New tor earl gemesierps HF YGU DGNWE‘ KNQW YGUR FUTURE ABDRESS, GEVE Uh YGUR PRESENT AQBRESS AND NOTEFY US Qt? £ng CHANGE.