hogs Two ARMOUR ’ ARMEEE TECH NEWS Student Publication of the ARMOUR lNSTlTUTE OF TECHNOLOGY CHXCAGO, ILLINOKS Published Weekly During the College Year on be Cleave to “The Slipotick"; let the Slapstick fly where it may. “THE Stilldl'lt'll” no no THE STAFF MANAGING BOARD ..John Hommes, ’29 . red B. Farrell, ’ Russell E. Johnson, ’29 tofessor Walter Hendricks Editor-in-Ghief .. Managing Editor Business Manager.. Faculty Adviser..... NEWS DEPARTMENT .......................................... David T. Smith, ’30 .John S. Meck, ’30; F. B. Attwood, ’31 V. A. Sturm, ’30; Harry Bailey, ’30 ........................ A. B. Auerbach, ’31 . W. Carlson, ’32, F. M. James, ’31; Stephen ’30; F. W. McCloska, ’29; Jerome Meyer, ’32; II. I’. Richter, ’32; W. H. Rudolf, ’32; Max Schinke, ’32; Vernon A. Sturm, ’30; Wm. Ed- monds, ’32; A. Wicrzbowski, ’32; C. E. Rudelius, ’30; F. E. Sandborn, ’30. SPORTS DEPARTMENT Sports Editor ............ .C. Stempkowski, '32 Assistants—J. P. Edstrand, Jr., 29; W. Paradzinski, ’30. V. Taylor, '82.. EDlTORlAL DEPARTMENT .Al Auerbach, ‘31 J0 n G. Attwood, ’29 J. M. Jacobson, ’29 . Ashcnhurst, ’32 ..(0pen) Newe Edito Assistants... Fraterni ’e Copy Reports Janiszewski, Inquiring Repor er Editorial Writers MAKE-UP DEPARTMENT Make-up Editor .................................. W. J. Ehrmeyer, ’29 Assistants—M. L. Morgan, ’31; R. Steinert, ’31; E. J. Wiltrakis, ’32. BUSHNESS DEPARTMENT Advertising Manager ........... Stanley A. Beatty, ’30 Assistant .....M 0. Nelson, ’30 Solicitors. .R. G. Kcllner, ’31, F. W. Spaulding, ’31 ~Circulation Manager .................. . ..... John W. Gamble, ’29 Assistants—J. S. Meek, ’30; C. H. Johnson, ‘30; A. H. Jens, ’31; G. Reichlc, ’30; A. J. Lenke, ’81; L. W. Booker, ’31; F. W. Spaulding, ’31; E. J. Wiltrakis, ’32; E. A. Scanlan, ’32; E. W. Carlson, ’32. Exchanges .......................................... John E. Barman, ’29 Our Financial Statement The following statement shows the total income and expenditures made on the ARMOUR TECH NEWS up to the beginning of this semester, or February 1, 1929. It therefore includes the five issues of Vol. I, published in the spring, of 1928, and the sixteen issues of Vol. II, pub- lished last semester. INCOME Auvci .. mg .$ 723.70 Subscriptions, Vol. I .................... 131.20 ”‘ ‘ '3' Vol. TT 570.00 Cash Sales .. ...................................................... .20 TOTAL INCOME ............................................ $1425.10 EXPENSES Advertising Expense . ..... $ 36.5"! Circulation Expense . .. 55.16 Cuts and Plates 58.34 Collections ......... .10 Editorial Expense 55.91 Complimentary Subscriptions 11.00 Office Supplies ..... 9.11 Exchange Expense 7.00 Advertising Discounts 34.511 Presswork .......... 970.40 Stationery and Printing, Misc. 79.55 Salaries (none) ...................... TOTAL EXPENSES $1317.68 NET GAIN ................ 107.42 $1425.10 Respectfully submitted, RUSSELL E. JOHNSON, ’29, Business Manager THE ARMOUR TECH NEWS. February 4, 1929. ' Still Much To Learn About this time of the year, many students, especially seniors, are apt to become disturbed as to their future in the engineering field. Culminating four or more years of what they consider hard work, they are not offered the variety of lucrative positions expected. Instead employers are found hand picking the applicants for the type of men desired, and offering a wage in the neighborhood of fifty cents per hour, less than that which many of the men have already received for part time or summer work. Such a rude awakening often sets these men to doubt- ing the wisdom of pursuing an engineering career, and to wondering if after all engineering is really so cssen~ tial to civilization. Perhaps the words of an editor of a financial magazine would return to these men some peace of mind. In dis— cussing those trends in modern business which were in— creasing proiits, he writes, “Today industrialists are bending every effort to evolve new contributions of sci— ence to industry—3’ “Three outstanding industrial organizations among the dozen billion dollar corporations of the United States, are umn On this page. direct steals from the leading humor magazines. this column is by no means entirely original, all jokes are taken from. sources not forbidding reproduction, exclud— in},r those sent in, the origin of which we cannot deter- We are forced to discard all jokes that are recog— nized as contraband, inasmuch as the humor magazines are copyrighted. Thanks. a mine. pared. Prepare yourself. temperature breaks 68. spending money liberally in the laboratory for purely scientific research.” He goes on to tell how individual developments not only benefited the buying public (nine million dol- lars in one your for one case), but at the same time have 0 have yet to learn, increased the profits of the corporation. The Whole Story Prof. Teach: What do we mean when We say that the whole is greater than any of its parts? Studc: A lunchroom doughnut. =11 1% *4 I. O. N. breaks back to the colyum with a dig that the best of friends must park. :1: a. Ilx Why haven’t you shaved this morning? Ain’t I shaved? No, you’re not, and I want to know why. Well, you see, there was a dozen of us at the house using the same mirror and I must have shaved some other guy. :14 >1: :1: -—A,. J. Gee, I’d like to have a job in the country. Whaddya mean,“ a farmer? Naw, I’d like to be the guy that plows the detours. 9.: :l: all Have you heard about the fellow who had saved $100,- 000 by hard work, perseverance, indomitable energy, and an uncle who died and left him $99,997. 0‘ 7k 50 ———Freddie . Pledge (at dinner table): Must I eat this egg? Active: I should say so. Hop to it. Silence. Pledge (weekly): And the beak, too‘! '4! 9.7 ’2‘- Environment First Flea: Been walking? Second Flea: Nope, been on a tramp. a :1: :1: 9]: Labor Saving After I wash my face, I look in the mirror to see if it’s clean. Don’t you? ——Freddie. V May we digress from humor, and imitate the first col- We ask that our contribs try to avoid While Naw, don’t have to. I,.z211st look at the towel. tk filfi >l= Pun! Pun! Pun! Fun! Fun! School Gossip Mechanical: Architect: Gee. How does it work? Mechanical: Well, by means of a pedal attachment to a fulcrumed lever it converts vertical reciprocating mo- tion into circular movement. machine is a huge disk that revolves in a vertical plane. Power is applied thru the axis of the disk, and work is done on the periphery and they claim the hardest steel may be reduced to any shape by it. What do you call it? Architect: Good gosh! Mechanical: A grindstone. ='.\' 7!: Pun! 'R. H. L. says someone has discovered that onions have history, but I think that garlic has descent. —-Charlie.‘ Il< :h z]: This morning I went over to see a new machine we have at the shop, and it’s astonishing how it works. The principal part of the Which Shows That Thick Books Are the Best to Buy Soph: I got flunk notices in all of my subjects, so 1 Wired mother to prepare father. Fresh: And did she? Soph: I’ll say she did. or. a: Heard of the Scotchman who found a couple of corn plasters and went and bought himself a pair of: shocs‘l 9.: wk >i= Did you observe Fire Protection Week? 3: iii :l: What are you doin’, Attwood? Scribbling some stuff for the NEWS. Why are ya tcarin’ your hair? 0h, Hommes asked me for a good yarn; that means a well knit story and I shrink from it. my wool for an idea, s: =‘.< :k “What a rotten date,” he said, contemptuously, as he spat out the seed. >3 u Prof. Krathwohl was rather original last week; when a chap told him that he lived in South Chicago, the glmd man thought a moment and said, “Well, I don’t suppose you can’t help that.” s :r Seems that one of the frosh was in the balance room and one of the engines was shaking the building, as usual. Wearily, the youth addressed his swaying rid all your faults I love you still.” It’s a terrible strain. 1 got an answer: Father pre- —A. J. -—F.B A . Yes, I got to the oiiice earlier; the boss was getting sore. It’s got me pulling One day you take out the new topcoat, brush it, and say, “Well, I’ll wear it tomorrow.” It snows. So you drag forth the old overcoat, and the Think we’ll invent a weather regulator or something; and win the praises of humanity. ——A1 Auerbach. This is just one instance of the many cases which could recognized. be adduced to illustrate the prominent place in afl’uirs that the individual still holds in spite of the increasing tendency toward merging of huge interest and capital. These expected high salaries were counted upon prob- have ably becariec one thought he had assimilated enough knowledge, but perhaps the fifty cent an hour jobs are fl’ercd because the employer knows how much we really before we can make our individuality wJ.S.M. Prof. Guy Maurice Wilcox (A Biographical Sketch) born in Kansas, in 1870. By STEPHEN JANISZEWSKI, ’30 Professor Guy Maurice Wilcox was His family ‘ Eh". download issues For firms liaise For? Dr. H. M. Raymond left early in the week for a short stay on his farm near Grass Lake, Michigan. He will be back at his desk by Monday morn- national parks in the West and the scenic points of the East. His embi- tion is to see as much of the world as possible. Although he takes great interest in everything, he enjoys the natural scenes most and is fond of all out-door activities and sports. When asked if there was some out- standing incident in his life which he would like to disclose to the students and faculty members, Prof. Wilcox could not recall any, but upon second _ thought he looked up from his desk with a twinkle in his eyes and a rem— iniscent smile—at a’ recollection of some athletic event perhaps which took place some forty years ago—~he added, “At least I have never run sixty—two yards in the wrong direc- aM as, FLEW’ER TUG- filial! ES EEW 5mm AT essences Berkeley, Calm—3’92? novel ow time at the University of California ‘ is the annual Ford joustiug. {corner ment, which is just a high-hat monik- er for a flivver tug-c’wwar. bi , son students corral all available 0:3 Fords, tie them together with heavy ropes, shove them in reverse and their ’ drive'like everything. Great sport for everybody concerned, but hard on the machines. Probably the idea was fostered by some rascally auto salesman. University of Hawaii—Freshmen boys at the University of Hawaii: must carry two brands of cigarets,2in a nice, White, clean sock, Withom holes. The girls are required to wear grass skirts and goggles and in; a: ways be plentifully supplied with is oritc brands of jellybeans. ' The women’s rifle team clef the men’s team at the University Kansas this season, with. a score 2945 to 2935. This was the fast tight er, “With ——TAP. moved to Minnesota when he was twelve and it was there that he at- tended and graduated from Carlton College, in 1891, receiving his A. B. degree. In 1892, Prof. Wilcox became a teacher at the Minnesota School for the Deaf. From 1894 to 1896, he taught science in a high school. Dur- ing the following four years he was an instructor at a school in Albert Lea, Minn. In 1900, Prof. Wilcox did graduate work at the University of Wisconsin, where two years later he became instructor in physics. Twenty-six years ago, on Feb. 5, 1903, Prof. Wilcox came to Armour as the Head of the Physics Depart- ment. Prof. Wilcox was married to Lil— lion E. Spencer. in 1883. He is the father of one son and three dough» tors. His son, Maurice L. Wilcox, graduated from the mechanical e11— gineering department of Armour in 1916. Two of his daughters are graduates of the University of Wis— consin and one from the University of Chicago. When a sophomore in college, Prof. Wilcox thought very much of entering into the engineering profes— sion but upon advice from his parents he continued his regular school Work. At one time Prof. Wilcox took a course in surveying and when not teaching in high school during the summer months, he was employed by a country surveyor, where he derived much pleasure from his out-door work. Besides his surveying experi- ence, Prof. Wilcox admits the closest he came to being an engineer is to teach in an engineering school. The manuals used in the physics laboratory at Armour were written by Prof. Wilcox and every experi- ment was actually performed by him with the laboratory apparatus in the preparation of this manual. In the line of research, Prof. Wil- cox has added his contribution to sci- ence. As a result of his research, material has been published on “The Optical Rotatory Power of Sugar in a Non-Aqueous Solution." Prof. Wilcox is a fellow member in the American Association for the Ad- vancement of Science as well as a fellow member in the American Phys- ics Society. As a member of the In- stitute of Radio Engineers, he was chairman of the Chicago Section of this society in 1927. He also is a member of the Chicago Radio Engi- neers and was the first president of this organization in 1925. Prof. Wil- cox holds membership in the Society for the Promotion of Engineering Education. While in school, Prof. Wilcox played football, baseball, tennis and was on the track team in college. Duck-hunting and shooting was his favorite sport in Minnesota. Prof. Wilcox admits he played golf before his interest in radio, which takes most of his idme new. His present recrea- tion is travelling and fishing and he enjoys a swim before breakfast when out “roughing it.” Prof. Wilcox has toured by auto- mobile to all parts of the country and Canada. With the exception of: a few Southern States, he has toured flirting}: every State in the Union and has visited all of the hugger cities and .” ter—team contest won by the women ‘lEfllflu ‘ ‘ ‘E'uli‘i'r (ill I g 15"}! r t llll'lim in ‘K ,. ,II llllllllll .mHIHHHHm hm "hm ’ ”i In; I 11111!!! 11111111111111!!! ’.”.’”/'// onnvsusrrr SUITS ass roseoars ' BY dlhtortsslilsasc Eh! TEE. LY'JETGN CGELEGE SEES}? , assess , , » flimsyiiisardidtsfds STATE cuzc’ 5%“?SQN—vflhficmgc Q55? Ems} u...